3 Dating Mistakes Men Make
|Lauren Hostert • 10/05/12|
Dating can be difficult for both males and females. Differences in needs and communication styles can leave men feeling suffocated and their fairer counterparts feeling ignored. Love is hard to find, and it’s disappointing when a genuine connection becomes complicated by semantics.
Before you write off your newest lady friend as unreasonable, here are few mistakes you might be exhibiting that leave her feeling less than appreciated.
1. Not reminding her she’s valued.
Men and women have completely different styles of expressing their wants and needs. While you may be content in knowing where your girlfriend’s affections lie, she may be looking for you to say the words.
Even if it’s too early in your relationship to feel comfortable saying “I love you,” remember that a few well-placed affirmations can do a great deal in making your counterpart feel confident and wanted.
Women, often more so than men, like to be reminded they’re valued. Remind her of the things you enjoy about her and your relationship, and you may be surprised how far providing that security goes.
2. Not letting her be interested.
In relationships, it can be difficult to bridge the gap between your interests and hers. Maybe you’re into gaming and she’s into pottery, but don’t leave her chained to the kiln so soon.
If you’re at home watching “Lord of the Rings” with your friends or knee deep in a WOW campaign, don’t automatically assume she doesn’t care.
Girls can often feel subjugated to prescribed gender roles, so don’t always take her naivety for scorn. Your girlfriend is interested in you, and the things you do in your free time are a huge part of that.
Try explaining the game you’re playing to her and let her try it from the beginning. Explain the keys and the objective and let her have a chance to actually play.
Instead of having her listen in to you and your buddy debate the latest issue of the graphic novel you’re reading, buy her the first issue and let her decide for herself if she likes it.
Even the girliest of girls can surprise you, but you have to give them the chance.
3. Not managing your time.
One of the most difficult aspects of maintaining a long-term relationship is working out a balance between your relationship and the rest of your life. While it’s important to spend time with your significant other, forsaking her for your personal life often leads to resentment.
Be honest with your girlfriend. If you need a night out with your boys, just say so. As discussed previously, it’s important to make your girlfriend feel like she can take part in your interests.
That said, it’s completely normal to have some activities or even just time to yourself, and your girlfriend probably feels the same.
Don’t feel like you need to hide or fight the urge to be alone, just don’t lie about what’s going on. Chances are, your girlfriend would probably enjoy a night or two out with her friends, too.