3 Mistakes Guys Make Early On in a Relationship

Carmelia Ray
Carmelia Ray
January 4, 2013
3 Mistakes Guys Make Early On in a Relationship

In the early stages of a relationship, you may feel a mixture of emotions, ranging from extreme highs like excitement, anticipation and thrill, to extreme lows like insecurity and uncertainty.

Being in a new relationship with a great girl can be a lot of fun, but you may also find yourself a bit confused about the things you should be doing or saying while in this early relationship stage.

Let me ease your confusion with the top three mistakes guys make early on in a relationship and what you can do to avoid them.

Acting like a female.

Guys, a big turn-off to most girls is when you start to act like a female. Acting like a female refers to the type of guy that is overly emotional, insecure, moody, drops everything for a girl when she calls, asks a million questions and constantly displays his “feminine” side.

After all, most women want a “real man” and a guys’ guy. If you show ANY signs of being needy or insecure, this could be a reason for her to lose interest.

Women may love the open communication and the fact you can express yourself well, but if you appear to be really “INTO” her, you might want to hold back just a little bit.

Ladies like being desired and chased, but feeling like you may be smothering and “stalker-like” will raise some red flags.


“Avoid making promises or statements

you can’t keep or live up to.”

Creeping her Facebook and liking everything.

If she’s accepted you as a friend on Facebook, I would say the MAXIMUM number of “likes” you should display publicly is one or two profile pictures.

It’s one thing for a girl to assume she is being creeped on by a new guy via Facebook, but it’s another thing when the new guy likes EVERY SINGLE photo on her profile, INCLUDING pictures of her from four years ago. She get’s it, you like her.

To the rest of the world, this sort of behavior is creepy. I’ve had girls tell me they wanted to block this person or “limit” them because the new guy is liking pictures and statuses at all hours of the day. Obsessed much?

Texting vs. calling.

We are in a society where texting has replaced verbal communication. The challenge with texting is there is a lot of room for misinterpretation and miscommunication.

Also, girls tend to freak out, prejudge and monitor your “response time” to texts after they think you received them.

I would establish communication rules in the early stages of a relationship so you can set some guidelines up front about how each of you prefer to communicate.

Whenever there is confusion over communication styles, I would advise you to pick up the phone and call her. You should always be considerate of the times you contact her so there is an opportunity to actually converse with one another.

Some girls ONLY text, while some girls ONLY like calls. Some girls live on their FB profiles, tweet, email or use some preferred messenger app. Your job is to figure out if she prefers texting or calling.

AVOID specific times to call back, as you never know what you might be doing at that time. You wouldn’t want her coming to any sort of conclusions when you don’t call back at the moment you said you would.

Remember, you’re also being judged by your WORD and how often you break it, so avoid making promises or statements you can’t keep or live up to.

Photo source: xanga.com

Carmelia Ray is a 20-year matchmaking, dating and attraction expert. She has personally interviewed more than 50,000 singles across North America looking for love and is co-founder of her dating blog www.datingloveandsextips. Her e-book "The Ultimate Guide to Attracting & Keeping Your SoulMate" reveals 26 secrets to finding and keeping the love you want, based on her conversations with singles and working in the matchmaking industry. Connect with her on Google+.

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6 Responses

    I’ve been out of the dating scene for so many years that I’ve forgotten about all of the ins and outs of starting a new relationship. It’s been so long, I didn’t have to worry about texting vs calling or social media stalking! From personal experience, I wholeheartedly agree with your first tip.

      C. Price
      Cynthia Price (DatingAdvice.com)

      That’s great to hear, Kareen! Hopefully you can keep these tips in mind the next time you start a new relationship :)

    In the beginning she was very loving but now I am the one who shows all emotions and and it seems tat she is just not into the relationship like she was ..need some help!

    After reading your article, I immediately hit myself in the forehead. Great advice, thank you!

      C. Price
      Cynthia Price (DatingAdvice.com)

      Haha, I’m glad you liked Carmelia’s article! Nothing wrong with a little reminder every once in a while :)

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