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|Dr. Wendy Walsh • 9/25/14|
Much of the writing I do is aimed at women who have a difficult time discerning commitment-oriented men from predatory dudes who only want to obtain sex.
But every so often I get emails from men who tell me horror stories about women who seem to “play” them.
When women act as dating predators, they are often looking to extract something other than sex. They might be looking for resources, an ego trip or a notch in their G-string.
And plenty of them look and act like nice girls who could be good girlfriend material.
So how does a guy tell them apart? Here’s a cheat sheet:
This woman says she believes in traditional gender roles, with the woman giving care (and sex) and the man being the resource provider.
Her technique is to shame guys into thinking other men spend more money on her. She’ll slyly drop designer names and mention certain jewelry comes from previous boyfriends.
Her subtle message is you better step up if you want to play with the big boys.
She’s easy to screen out. Simply give her more experiences than material gifts. Make a date for a long hike and a modest picnic. See a museum and walk in the park afterward.
If she complains about this, then you’ve got her pegged.
“Predatory women aren’t interested
in getting emotionally intimate.”
This is the insecure woman who waters down the milk with a litany of men who swoon over her. She needs to have a wide bandwidth of male attention in order to like herself.
Want to call her bluff? Ask her to purge some of her “ex” boyfriends from her Facebook page or change her relationship status to say she’s in a relationship with you.
If she’s a male attention junkie, she won’t be able to go cold turkey.
Plenty of young woman have adopted a male model of sexual behavior, or at least what they THINK is a male model of sexual behavior – the player.
Just like the worst of men, they sexually hit and run and think this is OK because “men do it.”
Plenty of them are having so much fun playing musical beds that they are ignoring their fertility window and sexually “auditioning” partners.
They think, erroneously, that when it comes time for them to settle down, the music will stop in their game of musical beds and they will sit down into a life of blissful monogamy.
In truth, they are training their bodies to have a taste for variety and cheating may be in their future.
These gals are so easy to screen out. Just slow the pace of the sexual relationship and they will move on.
Bottom line: Predatory women aren’t interested in talking about feelings and getting emotionally intimate. They make men feel “less than” instead of building them up.
If your dating relationship brings you more feelings of anxiety than comfort and security, then steer clear of this woman.
Fellas, have you ever dated a “bad girl”? What was your experience like? What advice would you offer other men who are in similar dilemmas?
Photo source: auxillarymagazine.com.