I Scared Her Away. Is There Any Way I Can Salvage This?

Dr. Wendy Walsh Dr. Wendy Walsh • 9/25/14

Reader Question:

I am a 31-year-old single father. I met this woman online two months ago. We finally met for coffee one morning. It was fantastic! I asked her to lunch and we had a great time. She and I have so much in common on a personal level.

After drinking some wine, I text her all of these deep things, like I’m the best man she’s ever met, how great she is, etc. The next day I apologized. She replied “Yeah, you def scared me away. I am not sure what to even say.” I replied if she could overlook it, I’d like to see her again. She gave no reply.

Is there any way I can salvage this?

-Joe (Ohio)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Joe,

In a word, no. But you did learn a very valuable lesson: The early dance of love involves the ability to pursue yet contain yourself.

It’s kind of like learning to drive a stick shift. Too much clutch or too much gas can cause you to stall. Next time you’ll do better.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.