Our Date Didn’t Have Sparks Like When We Met. How Do I Get it Back?
|Dr. Wendy Walsh • 8/10/12|
I met a girl two months ago. She was great, lots of chemistry. We had our first date but it didn’t have anywhere near the spark like when we first met. When I saw her again, I completely fell for her and it completely ruined my confidence.
How do I get that spark back without coming on too strong?
Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:
Let me get this straight. When you met by chance and there was no pressure, there was exciting chemistry. But when you called it a first date, the high expectations made you lose your confidence.
It seems like your mojo will come back when you lighten up the situation. Forget the nervous formal dates for now. Bring her to a social event with a group of people, make the date some kind of outdoor adventure, go work out together, or do some community service together.
When you have the distraction of other people or a shared activity, you’ll be relaxed enough for sparks to fly again.
No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.