Men's Dating

The Dating Muse Esmée St. James Brings Out the Best in Single Men With Her Supportive Coaching

Hayley Matthews
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The Short Version: After spending over 25 years in the modeling industry, Esmée St. James became the Dating Muse to help smart men find love in the San Francisco Bay Area. The professional dating coach took all she had learned about personal appearance and social charm and applied it to the dating world to empower singles seeking a date. Now Esmée offers one-on-one coaching sessions and personalized dating makeovers to boost her clients’ self-esteem and show them how easy it can be to get a date when they have the right attitude. If you’re a nice guy who’s ready to get out of the friend zone, you can learn a lot from Esmée’s expert guidance and positive encouragement.

Parents ought to set a good example of healthy communication and enduring love for their children, but, unfortunately, that’s not always the case. Esmée St James said her parents bickered so much when she was growing up that she sometimes wondered if their relationship was in trouble.

Esmée St. James became a sought-after dating coach by using her experiences as a model to inform her advice for single men.

When she was a teenager, her father asked her for advice on how to make her mother happy. It broke her heart to see her parents struggling to connect with one another, and yet she felt powerless to fix it.

She said those early experiences impressed upon her the importance of fostering healthy, happy relationships. “I don’t want kids to be put in the position I was,” she said. “I want parents to set a better example of how relationships should be.”

After working as a model for 25 years, she decided to combine her passions for photography and relationships and become a dating coach in the San Francisco Bay Area. Today, she calls herself the Dating Muse and specializes in showing single men how to become the best version of themselves.

Her experience in the modeling industry taught her how to project an attractive, charming, and authentic image by feeling comfortable in her own skin. Now she shares her insights on body language, wardrobe, tone of voice, communication, and dating etiquette to teach daters how to make it easy for women to feel romantically attracted to them.

Whether she’s taking photos for a dating profile or sharing dating tips in an individual session, Esmée’s proactive coaching style gives men the confidence boost they need to improve themselves and navigate the modern dating world.

“We’re complex creatures,” she said, “and we all have our own unique challenges. My mission is to learn about those struggles and find ways to help.”

Dating Makeovers & Profile Overhauls in the Bay Area

A few years ago, the CEO of a local startup turned to Esmée for help refining his image. He came in wearing wrinkled clothing, scuffed shoes, and a downcast look. He didn’t feel good about himself, and he didn’t take care of himself — and it showed.

Esmée transformed his wardrobe, took professional-grade headshots of him and his team, and helped him believe in himself. Soon he was putting together million-dollar deals for his company and telling Esmée he owed his success to her coaching.

Esmée St. James, aka the Dating Muse, gives men a woman’s perspective on the dating scene in her book “Chick Magnet.”

Backed by decades of experience in front of and behind a camera, Esmée offers her services as a dating and style strategist for single men who need dating profile tips and want to feel genuinely confident around women. She knows how to build men up so they look great and feel good about themselves.

By coaching men one on one, Esmée brings out the best in her clients and helps single, divorced, and widowed men take the dating world by storm. You can get started with a one-hour consultation (online or in person) or dive right into a five-month-long coaching package to transform yourself inside and out. You can also check out her book “Chick Magnet,” which is set to be released in early February 2018.

She focuses on working with smart and relationship-minded men who are over 40 because she enjoys seeing the stereotypical nice and nerdy guy take a second shot at love and land a date with the woman of his dreams.

“I’ve spent my entire adult life helping men like you understand what’s special about their personalities,” Esmée wrote in her bio. “I take the guesswork out of the dating process, helping you find love much faster.”

A Library of Self-Help Resources For Men Over 40

Over the years, Esmée has written extensively about hot topics in the dating world and given men tips on how to successfully woo women in any setting. She speaks compassionately in the Dating Muse blog about ways to overcome rejection, improve one’s personal style or grooming habits, and make a desirable match. Her unwavering belief in the goodness of men inspires men to believe in themselves.

Esmée’s target audience is that classic Mr. Nice Guy who ends up in the friend zone because he’s too shy or too anxious to go after the woman he wants. She encourages smart, serious men who struggle with their love lives to step outside their comfort zones and pursue dates with courage and confidence.

“You need to get some skin in the game,” she said, “and forge your own path.”

Last year, the Dating Muse decided to write a book to share her insights with single men everywhere. It took her eight weeks to write and eight months to edit, but she told us she’s finally ready to send it into the world. Esmée’s first book, entitled “Chick Magnet: Insider Tips From a Female Dating Coach,” will be released as an ebook, audiobook, and hard copy in February 2018. The self-help book talks men through practical strategies to exit the friend zone and improve their dating prospects.

“I dive deep into what’s holding men back, so it’s not just a series of instructions,” she said. “It’s the insider’s tips guys don’t know but girls wish they did.”

Success Stories: When Mr. Nice Guy Attracts a Nice Girl

Esmée is a force for good in the dating ecosystem. She empowers nice guys to take control of their love lives and become more attractive dates. She told us the story of one client who had a bad habit of letting his friends (and his girlfriends) walk all over him. Her positive coaching helped him build up his self-esteem and stand up for himself. “Now he’s the one in charge of his life,” she said, “which is how it should be.”

“Esmée made me comfortable to take the plunge,” said Fritz A. in a testimonial. “[Her] concise and comprehensive analysis, targeted shopping aided by impeccable taste, plus tips and tricks all together resulted in subtle yet impactful changes.”

“Chin up, guys, working with Esmée will rock your world!” — Grant A., a photographer

An attorney named Sean M. said he felt overwhelmed by the prospect of dating after his marriage ended. “I knew I’d need a dating profile, and I’m very camera-shy,” he recalled. “From our first meeting, Esmée put me at ease.” Her wardrobe recommendations and photography services helped Sean put his best foot forward on a dating website.

Esmée said she is proud of her long list of testimonials from men who say they have an easier time getting dates thanks to her inspirational coaching. “I love knowing I’ve made someone happier,” she said. “It means I’m doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing and making the world a better place, not just for men but for women too.”

Esmée Inspires Singles to Improve Themselves

Esmée became a dating coach to uplift single men and give them the tools they need to get in stable, healthy relationships. She does all she can to set singles up for relationship success because she doesn’t want children to experience the kind of pain she felt when watching her parents fight.

Esmée has helped many single men realize their full dating potential.

Now known as the Dating Muse, Esmée shares her perspective as a model, a photographer, and a woman to show men how to become naturally irresistible to women in the dating world.

Her flirtation techniques, stylist recommendations, and motivational support have transformed the lives of men throughout San Francisco. All it takes, she told us, is a little confidence to charm your crush and build a lifelong connection.

“You should be in charge of your love life,” she said. “Ultimately, my goal is to help you live a better life and attract someone who loves you for who you are.”

About The Author

As the editor-in-chief of DatingAdvice.com, I oversee content strategy, social media engagement, and media opportunities. When I'm not writing about cheese or my 20-year love affair with Leonardo DiCaprio, I'm listening to The Beatles, watching Harry Potter reruns (I'm a proud Slytherin!), or drinking IPAs.