Every man knows the basic rules for romancing his lady. Flowers, chocolates, thoughtfulness, love notes, a candlelight dinner, and the list goes on. Basically, men can romance a woman by treating her like a woman. But what are the rules or methods you can use to bring a little romance into his life?
1. Don’t romance him the same way.
The way to romance a man is to not treat him like a woman. You must appeal to his manly instincts. You might really enjoy getting flowers and a singing telegram at work from your big hunk o’ love, but that’s not what a man wants. If you want him to feel like he’s standing at his desk in pink panties and lipstick, go ahead and send him a dozen roses and a love poem at work.
He may appreciate the thought, but there’s a good chance the other guys in the office have a seventh-grade mentality and will tease him mercilessly. But even if everyone thinks it’s great, remember that he is a practical man. He loves lavishing you with flowers, jewelry and candy, but those same things for him seem like a waste of money.
One nice watch, gold bracelet or ring with your name engraved on it is all he needs to be reminded of you. He probably doesn’t want a bunch of jewelry that will just sit in his dresser drawer at home most of the time. Flowers will die and end up in the trash. Send him a set of metric wrenches tied in a nice bow or Mass Effect 3 for his Xbox with a sealed card and promises of some great real-life action after the video game. Now there’s a good use of cash that will warm him up for you.
2. Use your secret weapons.
Many women have no idea how intoxicating a single touch of her silky smooth skin can be for a man. When he comes home, put your hand on his cheek when you kiss him. When he sits down, hand him his paper or magazine, take his shoes off, and rub his neck and shoulders for a while. Also, be sure to ask him about his day. He won’t reveal much, but let him know how much you appreciate his hard work.
If he’s in his favorite chair, take his hand and lead him to the couch or love seat where you can snuggle a bit with your head on his shoulder. Make sure you’ve put on just a light touch of his favorite scent. Unbutton one of his shirt buttons and caress his bare chest for a while. All of the little touches you might not always welcome from him, he will really appreciate from you. And they will definitely get him in the mood for romance. Give him a “private” touch if you dare, but make sure you are willing to cash that check later — or maybe right now.
“Flowers might make you weak in the knees, but you need to
do something that will make your man feel strong.”
3. Compliment his abilities.
Women love to have a man tell them they are pretty. Telling a man he is handsome will not have the same effect. Just as with the thoughtful little gifts, men thrive on more practical things. It’s better to compliment him on the hard work he endured to get those rock hard abs than to compliment him on how good his six pack looks.
That little rush you get when he compliments your beauty is the way he feels when you compliment him on how quickly and well he fixed those cabinet doors under the sink, how he helped your son understand his math assignment, or the way he got the kids fed and off to school when you had to leave for work early.
Men have to feel needed and competent. Call it male ego if you like, but is remembering your birthday with flowers and dinner really anything more than playing to your female ego? There’s nothing wrong with making a man feel good about himself. Ninety percent of his self-image comes from you.
Grandma knew the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, and that is still true today. A man will find it very romantic if you cook his favorite meal for him and treat him like a king for a while. Or just bring his favorite steaks for him to cook on the grill, and have some wine and music to go with it. (You’d better make the salad yourself, though.)
A tummy full of beef, a little relaxation or trip to the hot tub, and a glass of wine can be a prelude to the best sex you’ve ever had. It’s true. Really.
The key thing to remember when you want to do something romantic for your guy is to treat him like a man and to act like a woman. Flowers might make you weak in the knees, but you need to do something that will make your man feel strong.
He is the opposite of you in many ways. Your softness and need will make him feel strong and needed. He wants jewels for you but useful things for himself. He wants you to make him feel like the magnificent hero in a romance novel, and he wants you to be the fair damsel that quivers at his touch.
A little hokey? So are heart-shaped chocolates and love poems.