He is Physically Moving Too Fast. What’s Your Advice?

Dr. Wendy Walsh Dr. Wendy Walsh • 9/25/14

Reader Question:

I recently met a guy on a dating site. By the fourth date, we tried to go to second base. I thought that was too soon, so I pushed him away.

I feel he is moving too fast physically and he is only in it for one reason. I just feel we should get to know one another better before all that physical stuff. But we both are just so physically attracted to each other.

What’s your advice?

-Nina (New York)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Nina,

Trust your instinct. The number of dates and the amount of time you spend together before the onset of sexual activity is less important than how well you really know him.

If he’s not opening up (talking about family and future life plans) but prefers to be groping over talking, then you have your answer.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.