He Withdrew After Sex. Is There a Chance of Reconnecting?

October 26, 2012
He Withdrew After Sex. Is There a Chance of Reconnecting?

Reader Question:

Now that we have had sex, he has totally withdrawn. He only texts occasionally. I really liked this guy.

Is there any chance of reconnecting with him? If so, how?

-Amy (Ohio)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Ooooh, Amy. I wish I could say something you want to hear, but the best I can do is tell you what you need to hear.

Men don’t fall in love through sex. They fall in love through trust. Having sex, as you’ve seen, didn’t bring him closer and it may have driven him away.

If he’s a player, that’s almost certain. Research shows that the more sexual partners a man has had, the more likely he is to perceive diminished attractiveness in each new conquest.

Your only slight chance of connecting with him is to fall off his radar and see if he wonders where you went. But I highly doubt you can turn a sexual relationship into an emotional one after such a rupture.

My suggestion: Move on and be wiser and slower next time.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013). Connect with her on Google+.

Related Topics:
Mixed Signals Sex

1 Response

    For real on that. The next time you think you like a guy, remember this instance and you won’t mess up.

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