How Do I Tell My Boyfriend I’m Not Ready for Marriage?

Kara Pound Kara Pound • 8/31/12

Well, first of all, did he ask? If he hasn’t proposed or asked for a dowry, then you’re probably freaking out over nothing. But let’s say for argument’s sake that he did ask for your hand in marriage or has been seriously hinting at it.

Example, “When do you see us tying the knot?” or “We should totally go to the Eiffel Tower for our five-year anniversary.” If this is the case and you know you’re not ready for marriage, then you need to be 100 percent honest with him.

If you love him and he loves you, it shouldn’t matter when you get married. Sit him down and explain that you’ve noticed him bringing up the subject a lot. The reasoning behind not being ready is completely up to you.

Maybe you’re concentrating on your career? That’s fair. Or maybe you want to finish up your post-education before taking on a new responsibility. Also, very fair.

But if you know in your gut that he’s just not the right guy for you, that will never change. You either know or you don’t know and if you’re spending your time trying to figure it out, you should probably be 100 percent honest with not only him, but also yourself.