How to Not Become a Booty Call

Women's Dating

How to Not Become a Booty Call

Violet St. Karl Violet St. Karl • 9/25/14

One of the most debated questions of dating is when do you have sex?

There is no simple answer and people will agree and disagree, but waiting to have sex will not hurt a relationship.

One of the biggest culprits that clouds our judgement is alcohol. I recommend my two plus two rule when you are first seeing someone, which is no more than two drinks and no more than two hours with each other for the first three dates.

Why three dates?

Because you will have a good idea if you like someone and if they like you by the third date.

Although, I suggest you wait to have sex until you have gotten to know each other better. This could be within one month or three months. Allow your internal intelligence system to guide you.

The reality is many of us have sex to quickly and become the booty call with someone we like and want to pursue a relationship with. There are early warning signs that he is only after sex, which can help you weed out the jerks.

Only having drinks on the first date is fine, as many of us are meeting people online and do not want to invest a lot of time in a stranger, but stick to the two plus two rule.

“Don’t get caught up in sex, as it’s

only one element of a relationship.”

The glowing light bulb warning is:

If he is only asking you to grab drinks after the first date.

You may defend that warning with, “Some guys are just not great at dating.” Well, this is where your suggestions come in and will tell your fate of going down Booty Call Lane.

Suggest an event that is happening around town, such as a fair or festival or something as simple as frozen yogurt and a walk in the park, as this allows the two of you to converse, which begins building a foundation.

If he insists on only meeting to have drinks, then he is only interested in getting to know the drunk you and what the drunk you will do when you have enough alcohol in your system. Run away from this guy!

Now for those women who had sex after a few times of only meeting for drinks and want to pursue something more.

First, let me say your vagina does not have super powers that will convince this man you are more than a piece of ass, so clear that idea out of your head. The way to turn around this relationship, if possible, is to start building a foundation outside of sex.

This includes conversations about your lives, dreams and aspirations, finding things in common and spending time with each other outside of the bedroom or your homes. In the end, this will blossom into a relationship, or you’ll realize you have nothing in common and it was just good sex.

If you don’t want to be a booty call, you need to move on. Yes, move on. Don’t get caught up in the sex, as it’s only one element of a relationship and eventually will exhaust itself.

Photo source: huffpost.com.