Should Men Always Initiate Sex?

Nick Slade Nick Slade • 9/25/14

Ideally, it is usually best for men to make the first overt advance that triggers the sexual act. It allows a man to feel manly and lets the woman retain her value and reputation as a lady.

That said, most guys are pretty lousy at picking up the signals you send us, and we prefer to err on the side of gentlemanly behavior if we’re not sure that permission has been given, especially if it’s the first time for a new couple.

It is not only permissible, but much appreciated, when a woman untucks his shirt during a passionate kiss, slips her hand under his shirt, slides her fingertips briefly beneath his belt buckle, or simply asks him if he would like to retire to her room (or his), where they could be more comfortable or have more privacy.

A lady can always use an excuse if she doesn’t want to be too overt or direct: He can listen to your new CD in the bedroom, or you can get out of your tight clothes and into a nighty for comfort. Do what you can to encourage him if he is slow to take a hint. Let all of your actions serve as the permission he is looking for, and let him feel your passion. If all else fails, go ahead and make a move.