Spying on an Ex is Like Eating McDonald’s – Not Lovin’ It

Women's Dating

Spying on an Ex is Like Eating McDonald’s – Not Lovin’ It

Jennifer Gardella Jennifer Gardella • 9/25/14

You know that horrible feeling after eating a Big Mac and fries – the instant gratification is short lived when general grossness quickly takes over.

For me, this was the exact feeling I had each time I spied on my ex-boyfriend.

I was thrilled to be out of the relationship, but some twisted curiosity had me wondering what he was up to.

It was like fast food for the mind – garbage in and a gross feeling afterward.

Why is it not a good idea to spy?

  1. You are going to see a lot of things you do not want to see, like your ex. I mean really, who wants to see an ex?
  2. Your ex may be out having fun or checking in at your old haunts with new people, replacing you. Seeing this will bring up some negative feelings, even if you no longer want to be with your ex.
  3. Some of your ex’s postings may be fabricated because he knows and/or hopes you are spying and he wants to upset you. So you will be very upset over something that is not even real.
  4. You may find yourself emotionally reliving the relationship or back in the breakup. You want to be healing from that emotional pain, not inviting it back into your life.
  5. Spying on an ex is a crazy form of revenge because secretly you are hoping to find bad information. Living in a state of revenge is unhealthy.

“You can’t really move forward until

you clear you ex from your space.”

It is so easy to keep tabs on an ex.

With the way sites like Facebook are arbitrarily resetting privacy settings, many people have profiles open to the general public, so even if you unfriend a particular person, you still have viewing access.

The easiest way to go about breaking the addiction is to block your ex on Facebook, Twittter and Google Plus and disconnect from them on LinkedIn.

If you only unfriend them, you will still be able to see their comments on other people’s posts and the temptation may be too high for you to peek in on their profile if they keep it open.

Block them out of your life and commit to keeping the block.

You need to put the past behind you.

You can’t really move forward until you clear your ex from your space.

Holding onto the past does not allow you to move forward. Cliche, right? But it is the absolute truth.

It is not easy to break the intense addiction to spying, but it’s critical to moving forward.

At first, I often found myself wanting to peek, but I did not. It took every ounce of discipline I had to resist. Eventually the desire to spy was released and brought forth a sense of lightness.

This is the same lightness you feel when eating healthy food rather than McDonald’s.

Photo source: dailymail.co.uk.