3 Year Relationship with her (21 Years old) Confused. Needs to find herself

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3 Year Relationship with her (21 Years old) Confused. Needs to find herself

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 12:02 pm #146989
    3 Year Relationship with her (21 Years old) Confused. Needs to find herself

    So my girlfriend broke up with me recently, we’ve been together for 3 years since our senior graduation. She’s been engaged with another guy before all this and has a similar timing of 3 years but that’s because he actually cheated on her. Anyways we had our good relationship the first year and after that she said the starting of 2016 year to present that she felt like she didn’t really love me, she didn’t really didn’t feel herself. I always promised her that I would marry her and I will get her that ring, but I needed time to make sure she’s the right one. Which I figured out pretty quick but never gave her a ring, she always gave me hints or sometime of clue that she wanted a ring.

    I look back at our texts and my lack of communication to her was short texts and didn’t really give her the brief replies. My job is a technician and I’m always hands on working outdoors and full time job great pay. She’s a college student going to school and will graduate next year to become a teacher


    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 12:06 pm #146992

    She texted me recently saying that she felt distant of me and that she wanted to know what it’s like to live to herself and needs to focus on herself and also because of school. School just started and she told me the night before she went to school. I replied and asked her why I was in the way of her schooling because I’m not always with her most of the day. So I said I understood her and told her to focus on herself thinking she would focus and come back to me after that hard year of college to get back on track. She said that it’s the end of our relationship and I just basically snapped at her confused


    prattg25
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 12:18 pm #147002

    Hey I know it sucks but you have to give her space. She js starting school and theres alot of stress that comes with it. If it’s not meant to be then you have to accept it. Get back to bettering yourself and doing what makes you happy and if those feelings come back then great if not then theres alot of women out there for you.


    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 5:08 pm #146997

    She did mention that she just wants to be friends. The next day I couldn’t eat, sleep or concentrate. So I went to her workplace during lunch and she didn’t eat lunch but explained to me in my car and we both end up tearing down. She said that she needed to focus on herself and I just knew that can’t be the real reason for it. She told me she didn’t feel herself the last year that she was with me and that’s when I just got my full time job.

    I kept asking her why,why.why. She said you really want to know why while crying she said because I’ve been facetiming anlther guy since last year during our relationship, and old friend and still had ffeelings for him. They probably dated at 13-15. She said that she felt really bad and had no choice but to end both of us. I cried and asked her if it was bad she said no it wasn’t sexual or anytihing, I forgave her and threw random ideas like I’m sorry I should’ve gotten you a ring more soon and I’ve waited to long.


    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 5:10 pm #147004

    She admitted to me that she felt like she cheated on me with a connection of an old friend she used to date, her first love back when she was around 13-14. He said that he had feelings for her, she admitted that she had a boyfriend but had feelings for him too. She didn’t know wat to do so she had to end it with him and me also. Last minutes of her lunch I told her I’ll give her time just make sure to communicate and tell her I’m safe not to ignore her, she agreed and I told her I will always be there for you whenever you need me I will always support you.

    Next days and couple days I can’t concentrate and work, I’m basically depressed , lack of food, sleep etc.

    She told my best friend about the other dude coming into her life and she needed to end both of us because she still have feelings for him and that wasn’t a true relationship with me so she ended it.

    Her family loves me , I respect their religion and letting me in the house, so did my family.


    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 5:11 pm #147008

    I believe in her, I love her, my first love but I’m not that type of person everyone else is I will believe. She just posted a video on Facebook about a preschool couple promising as kids they will marry eachother when they get older, when they get older they marry eachother because he trusted her. We are still friends and she still told me on our breakup texts that she still love me.

    She has all my family on Facebook and Instagram and didn’t delete them. She deleted all my pictures of her profiles. She said there was nothing wrong about me and she messed up liking that guy so ended our great relationship.

    She is Christian and I’m not, I respect her religion and I see that tries to give me clues why she did the whole break up with her bible quotes Proverbs 31:25 & Pslams 73:26


    cantstopalan
    Participant
    August 25, 2017 at 11:05 pm #147113

    Will she come back in the future even though she says this is it and still has to end it right now