32 and never been on a date

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32 and never been on a date

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    NoLifeDGenerate
    Participant
    January 15, 2014 at 1:37 pm #46015
    32 and never been on a date

    I’ve been driving myself nuts for probably 16 years now. All I’ve ever really thought about was finding a girlfriend/wife. I’ve always been socially awkward and never got out much. I’ve never even had many friends. I’m a gentleman when I do go out. I’m kind and caring to a fault. I actually have one female friend that I blew like 4+ grand on after she lost her job many years ago. Her job was how I met her. I was slightly addicted to Waffle House when the food was good. She was a server. long story.

    I know I’m a bit different. I might border on Asbergers, or I might just be a special kind of asshole. After knowing that one friend, I’ve definitely gotten more comfortable with people than I used to be, but I’m still really quiet unless I actually have something to say. I can’t drum up conversation with random total strangers, and I pretty much never see women to have the chance. I’ve been using dating sites for years. I come up with a decent message now and then just to be ignored.


    NoLifeDGenerate
    Participant
    January 15, 2014 at 1:39 pm #46016

    What is this 1000 character limit BS? damn, that’s low.

    Everyone used to tell me you meet people through college or work. I did both. Never met anyone. It doesn’t work for me, and I got so fed up I pretty much quit life entirely. I sit here playing Halo, and I blog a bit (NoLifeDGenerate on Blogspot and Wordpess). Then I get depressed at times and can’t even stand to do that.

    They say there’s someone out there for everyone. I definitely disagree at this point. Any fresh ideas?

    p.s. For some reason uploading an avatar refuses to work for me in Chrome or Firefox. Not sure where to ask about that.


    killington1985
    Participant
    January 15, 2014 at 7:41 pm #46045

    I had the same problems as you. But I worked on them and now my weaknesses are my strengths. I take other people out to the bar just to show them how to get past those situations. practice practice practice. My friends have dates because I people I introduce them to at the bar.

    Next time you are at a bar. go up to a woman and tell her you noticed that she is beautiful and you would like to talk with her/buy her a drink. its genuine honest and simple.


    lvplayer
    Participant
    January 16, 2014 at 8:18 am #46046

    I have mild aspergers. Until recently, I had a lot of trouble with women.

    I’d highly recommend online dating, speed dating or tinder to get things going. Yes, most people have a social circle that ends up being the way they meet their significant others. Certainly wasn’t the case with me.

    What have you tried so far?

    December 22, 2014 at 7:12 pm #69551

    whenever I hear threads like this, it just angers me and pisses me off whenever people say it is never too late

    dmj106
    dmj106
    Participant
    December 22, 2014 at 11:32 pm #69558

    Man can I ever relate to this. I’m 23 and have dated one girl (only three dates, so not a whole lot). It’s soooo tough when you feel awkward and not confident around women, which I also struggle with. When you find someone that you do really enjoy, you tend to hold onto ideas about them for longer than you should. To this day I still think about what could have been with that one girl, but I constantly try to move on. I mustered up the courage this summer to finally ask another girl who I worked with out on a date, and she shot me down in a really negative and shitty way. I always feel like it’s never going to happen, and I can see where you’re coming from. My advice to you would be to just relax. When you relax, you can be yourself more. When you can be yourself more, you are taking that extra pressure off yourself. I would have never asked either girl out if I hadn’t gotten myself to relax somewhat. Start with being yourself consistently and seeing where that leads. Hope this helps!


    olaa
    Participant
    December 23, 2014 at 7:39 am #69562

    Hey, same here. I am also 34 and have never been on a date. But yes I am trying by going out to meetups and dating websites.

    December 23, 2014 at 7:32 pm #69573

    times like this make me hate having a penis, because us guys are expected to be the initiators

    dmj106
    dmj106
    Participant
    December 23, 2014 at 10:10 pm #69579

    I’m soooo glad you mentioned men being expected to be the initiators more. I was actually about to start a thread about this. Feel free to chime in!


    eric001
    Participant
    December 24, 2014 at 3:41 pm #69593
    Reply To: 32 and never been on a date

    hey, almost in the same boat as you. good luck…

    December 24, 2014 at 9:01 pm #69597
    Reply To: 32 and never been on a date

    ya and why should guys, men feel it to be a blessing, a luxury to be born male? so what if we don’t have to endure periods, pregnancy or childbirth? so what? as for getting old, well I say in my own personal opinion its easier for women to enjoy their 20’s than it is for men, men have to put forth more effort than women do if they want to enjoy their youth, their 20’s