A friendship dilemma?


A friendship dilemma?

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    March 30, 2016 at 1:03 am #96761
    A friendship dilemma?

    Okay, here it is. I’ve been working at this place for six months. I met a guy there. A really nice guy. At first, it started off as innocent flirting, jokes, teasing. But, then I got him a birthday present, which changed everything. Little dating within work, lunch, breakfast, etc Afterwards, I gave him my number, two weeks later he asked me out on a date. It was great until he told me he had a gf, my initial thought, I was a fool. But he reassured me, that liked me too.
    I told him, I need to leave him alone; which scared him, he thought we should remain friends, and after the shock so did I. Now mind you he still helped me move my furniture, etc .

    But, ever since he told me. His emotions is up and down. When clearly, I just want to move on, he still wants to flirt, etc. And, I’m not really into it as before. I still have feelings, but I know its time to move on. So, I tell him, I have other job interviews I might not be here for long. Now he’s distant. I just don’t get it. Why

    March 30, 2016 at 1:41 pm #96840

    Why do you even want to be friends with this dirt bag??! WHY did you initially think that YOU were a fool when clearly YOU didn’t know he had a gf?! YOU never did anything wrong. He is the prick and the reason he’s distant now is because he knows that he can’t play his deceitful fun game with you anymore…he can’t keep dangling that carrot in your face anymore….
    He is nothing but a lying deceitful person whom you should NEVER want to be friends with again…Period. Why would you want to be friends with a liar??You can’t trust him.
    You are doing the right thing in moving on although you still have feelings…feelings due to his lying to you and acting like he was single when he knew his situation this whole time.It’s just a game to him. Trust me when I say this…people like him will get what they deserve in the end…

    April 1, 2016 at 12:15 am #96909

    He doesn’t sound like a good guy. I always feel like if a guy would do that to his current girlfriend, what makes him not able to do these things behind your back if you guys ever dated? Overall, even if he is a nice guy and this is an exception, he doesn’t know what he wants. It’s not totally fair to you for him to mess with your emotions when he has a safety net of a relationship to ground him. I’d say just move on, he doesn’t seem like he cares all that much about your emotional well-being.

    April 6, 2016 at 3:30 pm #97195

    This kind of situation can be easily be handled. If it’s someone you’ve met at work or at a volunteer organization and you feel that things are warming up, the best approach is to hit it head on. Arrange to meet with the person for coffee or tea or even drinks. Tell them how you feel and what you’re really looking for. If they respond and tell you that they are in a relationship, say that you were hoping to date them. Watch the body language and say that if things change, to look you up. That way you know where you both stand. You will feel better about yourself. Move on and look for the next person.