Acceptable age difference?

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Acceptable age difference?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 2:29 am #126986
    Acceptable age difference?

    So I met a girl in a college class (we were actually in a few classes together before and never talked) but we started to recently. Still trying to get a read on how she feels about me, but I’m really into her and we talk a lot between and during classes. She also approached me to talk in the hall waiting for class to start the first time we talked. Problem is, there is I guess kind of a big age difference, which I know is a relative thing, but I am 28 and she is 21. Would this be too big of an age gap for most women? She knows my age so it at least wouldn’t be a surprise.

    Basically I want some opinions on if it’s likely she will think it’s weird or whatever if I ask her out? And yes, I know that I end up sounding like a bit of a trainwreck when I really get into a girl lol, so thanks for the insights!


    Mr.J
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 3:29 am #126988

    Its not weird bro.
    I guess you are thinking that she is more mature than you and she prefer a man at the same age with her..

    Yes she is matured, but loving someone who is older than you is not bad. Maybe she prefer some whos older, but you still have chance.
    I guess you are just shy to ask her? Am I right?

    F1end
    F1end
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 8:31 am #127010

    If you think something is wrong with it, there will be. If you think nothing is wrong with it, there won’t be.

    Get where I’m coming from?

    You decide what is acceptable, and what isn’t in your life. She will follow your lead, or not.

    Basically I want some opinions on if it’s likely she will think it’s weird or whatever if I ask her out? And yes, I know that I end up sounding like a bit of a trainwreck when I really get into a girl lol, so thanks for the insights!

    A considerable number of women like their men to be older and more experienced.

    Yet, she might worry “what will other people think?”

    It could well have no basis in her natural desire – purely a conscious logical hesitation.

    As men, we are the pursuers. And it pays to be self-assured.

    You draw her into your reality. And your reality is that this is good, normal, and fun.


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 9:17 am #126992

    Thanks for the response. Might have been mixed up in my original post, but I am the older one, so I guess I am worried she will think I am too old maybe. Not really sure what age gaps are considered normal by most people’s standards, mainly because I have always dated girls that are the same age or right around the same age.

    But if I get what you are saying, maturity and all that being similar are probably important. Just want to be sure she won’t be thinking it’s weird I’m asking her out as far as age goes.

    Either way though, yes, I am feeling really shy about asking her out, lol. Which is kind of weird for me, but when I am really into a girl to this level I guess I become shy about asking, so I am really worrying about being rejected. haha.


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 9:17 am #126995

    Its not weird bro.
    I guess you are thinking that she is more mature than you and she prefer a man at the same age with her..

    Yes she is matured, but loving someone who is older than you is not bad. Maybe she prefer some whos older, but you still have chance.
    I guess you are just shy to ask her? Am I right?

    For some reason my first reply didn’t post but thanks for the reply. I am actually older than her, so I guess I am just trying to figure out if it is a weird age difference, mainly because I have always seemed to date girls right around my same age. I guess its relative but just trying to see the norms. I do think your point on maturity makes sense and maturity level should be similar. And yeah, I’m shy about asking her out which is kind of weird for me but I guess when I am into a girl to this level I get shy and don’t want to be rejected, lol.


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 12:12 pm #127074

    F1end, that is great advice. Didn’t even think of it from this perspective. I definitely see where you are coming from and that makes a lot of sense.


    kennethagain
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 6:14 pm #127146

    As long as you both are willing to accept the age difference who cares? Howewver, it’s not going to be easy. Remember when you were 21? It’s the party era. If you aren’t the jealous or worry type it should be easy but I guarantee there will be some struggles. Just start slow and see where t goes.


    tennesee47
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 7:01 pm #127164

    Age is irrelevant for two consenting adults. Key word is adults.


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 9:42 pm #127168
    Reply To: Acceptable age difference?

    As long as you both are willing to accept the age difference who cares? Howewver, it’s not going to be easy. Remember when you were 21? It’s the party era. If you aren’t the jealous or worry type it should be easy but I guarantee there will be some struggles. Just start slow and see where t goes.

    Yeah, I’m starting to see I’m the only one overthinking the age difference, haha. But what is good I guess is that I’m usually not much of a jealous person or a worrier, and I’m always up for a good party (I’m not that old, lol). Thinks its good to keep in mind it will be a different experience w/ some struggles though. Good point. Thanks for the input.


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 15, 2017 at 9:45 pm #127169
    Reply To: Acceptable age difference?

    Age is irrelevant for two consenting adults. Key word is adults.

    I think I really was hung up more on age, in terms of the number, than necessary for whatever reason. I think I might be the only one haha. I guess I feel validated because I didn’t think it was weird, but I think I am just at the stage where I am really into her and I am overthinking everything like crazy.


    beck
    Participant
    February 16, 2017 at 12:44 am #127175
    Reply To: Acceptable age difference?

    I don’t think it’s weird at all


    sealegs
    Participant
    February 16, 2017 at 3:08 am #127190
    Reply To: Acceptable age difference?

    I don’t think it’s weird at all

    Awesome! It’s definitely validating to at least see that there isn’t anything weird about it to most and I appreciate the response.


    OnlyTheGhosts
    Participant
    February 16, 2017 at 2:14 pm #127302
    Reply To: Acceptable age difference?

    I dont see anything wrong here.