Am I friend-zoned already?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Am I friend-zoned already?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    coolio486
    Participant
    September 13, 2015 at 9:18 pm #85356
    Am I friend-zoned already?

    I’m not good at reading women because I’ve never really dated before (I’m 23), but my sister introduced me to one of her friends and she has got to be the cutest girl that I’ve ever met. So laid-back and easy to talk to, and I really want to get to know her more. I’m taking her to a football game with her favorite team (Which she agreed to go immediately) but I’m having trouble seeing if she sees me just as a friend or potentially more. (We’ve hung out with my sister a few times and she talks to me lots and laughs at my jokes and things but I’m not sure if she’s just being nice) She offered to pay for her ticket but I insisted, then she says that she’s buying the drinks, which I laughed and agreed to. She also offered to let me crash at her place afterwards to save on a hotel (I unfortunately live 10 hours away…). The distance thing is definitely bad, but she’s seriously like the perfect girl, and I’m more than willing to make weekend trips every few weeks. Is she just being nice?


    K-Mix
    Participant
    September 14, 2015 at 1:53 pm #85398

    You are definitely not in the friend zone. Let’s break this down a bit…

    When you’re at the game, it’s important to be flirtatious. Make some minor physical advances, like even as minor as your hand on her back for a brief second while you’re walking. Or a pat on the leg when her team makes a bad play. Be subtle, but make sure you do it multiple times. She’s going to pick up on that, it will make her realize that you are not looking to stay in the friend zone. If you get an opportunity in fluent conversation to somehow bring some sort of sexual tension into the equation, definitely do that too. Again, definitely be subtle and only do this if it fits fluently into the conversation. I had a girl once, for example, say something about how she doesn’t like wearing skirts very often because she needs to really watch how she conducts herself. So I just made a joke about how I think she should make a point on wearing skirts around me more often, and she can conduct herself….


    K-Mix
    Participant
    September 14, 2015 at 1:55 pm #85399

    … however she feels fit. Overall just be flirty, show you don’t want to be a friend.

    When you go back to her place, it’s completely up to you. If things are going really well feel free to make a move. Sometimes it drives a girl crazy, and confuses her, if you don’t though. I think you can’t really go wrong here either way, actually.


    coolio486
    Participant
    September 15, 2015 at 11:26 pm #85484

    You really think I’m not in the friend zone? I’m on the fence, I’m really wondering if she just thinks of me as a friend, but maybe she wants to test me out at the game. Not really sure if she considers the game a date or not, but I definitely want to make *very subtle* contact with her (the touching the back just even for a second I’ve been told can definitely leave a great impression) I’m flying in and she immediately offered to pick me up, which I agreed with. And the next day I have a whole day with her until I fly out home, so I offered to take her to a movie or dinner and she agreed with that, plus I want to get to know more about her as much as possible, and with any luck, she will want to know more about me, which I assume would be a good sign. I want to leave her with an impression that I’m boyfriend material, and make her miss me when I leave.


    CantFindName
    Participant
    September 17, 2015 at 7:25 am #85512

    yup,not friendzoned that’s for sure


    K-Mix
    Participant
    September 17, 2015 at 5:05 pm #85564

    Even if you are, you aren’t so deep into it that you can’t change it with a few flirtatious gestures. Girls don’t simply “friend zone” guys and shut the book, in my experience it doesn’t work that way. That’s why so many relationships start with people being friends first, it’s very common. It sounds like you have the right idea, so just play your game and don’t second guess yourself. The only difference between how you treat her and how you treat a girl you’re dating should be the delicacy of the situation. Don’t be so forward, be subtle, but make sure she knows that SOMETHING is there. It will leave her sort of wanting more, she’ll definitely be thinking about it.