am i making a big deal?

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am i making a big deal?

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    Jenny_08
    Participant
    March 6, 2015 at 8:02 am #74884
    am i making a big deal?

    Im confused now so i really need ur advice. Here’s the thing.
    I met this guy via a dating site, we talked for a couple of weeks before he asked me out on a date. We hit it off and been together for over a month, nothing official yet as we are still getting to know each other.
    A few days ago, he said he would have frd (which is a girl and they only met once or twice in thailand, she’s Japanese anyway) coming over to visit and maybe staying at his place for a week, well coz she doesn’t wanna spend money on the hostel. He’s staying with 2 homies and they don’t have any spare room. He said she could be sleeping on the couch but i doubt it. And he also said he might be busy showing her around so we cant meet for a week. I dont have any problem with that, i just dont understand why we cant meet while she’s here. He’s not supposed to be with her all the time, is he? He said he doesn’t wanna leave her alone as she doesn’t know anyone here and she doesn’t even speak english well. Plz help me

    CassieRose
    CassieRose
    Participant
    March 6, 2015 at 1:18 pm #74940

    Honestly if I was in your position I’d be pissed too. But since you guys have only been seeing each other for the month, I would give him the benefit of the doubt. You don’t want to seem to clingy and attached-especially if he really is doing what he says he is. And if you find out he lied, call him out and leave.


    UnderwaterThoughts
    Participant
    March 8, 2015 at 3:35 pm #75008

    Yeah, I think the best thing is to be honest and ask if there’s anything going on with the girl and if not say you’d like to meet her. You’re not making a big deal, but the fact you care might suggest you like him more than just casually?


    adoki84
    Participant
    March 8, 2015 at 4:03 pm #75012

    Just talk about it and get it off your chest


    Jenny_08
    Participant
    March 9, 2015 at 8:38 am #74968

    Thanks Cassie. He’s just admitted that he slept with her before and he hasn’t seen her since. I know we’re not committed yet, i don’t have problems with him seeing other girls but i cant stand him sleeping with other girls while we’re dating. He said that he liked me a lot and this girl would only be here for a week. But it just bothers me so much coz i think if he can’t keep himself from sleeping with her, then he just doesn’t like me as much he thinks


    cosmo.io
    Participant
    March 9, 2015 at 8:38 am #74994

    Not a good sign, You and him should be showing her around the town together, I think you should assume he does not want this gal to know he has a girlfriend – ie., he’s available,


    SweetMisery
    Participant
    March 12, 2015 at 12:45 pm #75247

    talk about it


    RobbyM
    Participant
    March 12, 2015 at 5:37 pm #75272

    Hello Jenny,

    In all honesty this is not a good situation. A man would definitely make time for you if he really likes you. I believe he is still on the prowl and wants to keep his options open with other women. You may be just a women he caught onto for a bit, but maybe he’s not ready to settle down yet. I think the best option to do is to talk about the dynamic of where the relationship between y’all is heading. I know it’s still early and only a month, but you rather get as much information as possible rather then be left in the dog house.

    March 19, 2015 at 5:18 pm #75690

    you are not making a big deal! uncalled for!


    secretlyconfused
    Participant
    March 26, 2015 at 5:13 pm #76151
    Reply To: am i making a big deal?

    If i were in your postion i would be very upset. I mean i understand that he does not want to leave here alone, but at the time time he should know how to balance and make you a priority also. I mean if he truly cares he would make time for you, and why would he not want you to meet her.