Am I stuck in his "friend zone"?

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Am I stuck in his "friend zone"?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    Stardust
    Participant
    June 3, 2014 at 11:44 am #54344
    Am I stuck in his "friend zone"?

    A few weeks ago at a party my guy friend sat very close to me on the couch. He touched my arm to talk, his leg and hip kept touching mine (he left it there). He tried hard to get my attention, gave me compliments, stared a lot, said my name often, asked questions, told jokes, and smiled/laughed at my jokes. He never showed that much physical interest before. But I dont think I showed a lotta interest back. I just sat there and did nothing that night because our friends were there. When I was leaving the party he saw me give hugs to everyone (all mutual guy friends). He was the last one I hugged and I could see he looked sad almost.

    So today I thanked him for helping my sister out. He said no prob, u girls are like sisters to me. He’s never said that before. I wouldn’t say our relationship was a bro/sis one, we’re not close friends. I have other examples of him showing romantic interest in me. But I don’t get it. Was I led on and then friend zoned? Or could he be lying?


    AllAmericanGirl
    Participant
    June 3, 2014 at 12:16 pm #54345

    I think he was trying to save face since you didn’t reciprocate his advances. Do you like him? Would you want to pursue something with him?

    If yes, I would ask him to do something with you (not in a group setting) but not specifically call it a date. Just get his feel for the situation. Try not to overthink…that is what I have learned.


    Stardust
    Participant
    June 3, 2014 at 1:23 pm #54357

    You’re saying that he felt rejected so he said I was like his sister? Hmm… Don’t know why, we’re not even real good friends.

    I do like him, but I think I blew my chance by avoiding his face and acting nervous around him. Once I even told him he made me nervous :/


    Nathaniel
    Participant
    June 3, 2014 at 10:20 pm #54399

    I doubt it, for one, its a lot harder for a girl to get in the friend zone, not being sexist but studies show that girls are a lot more selective then guys, and we usually have to the chasing, which is why we end up in the friend zone. I am not saying its impossible, but if you are good looking, have a nice personality, and appeal to him even a bit, many guys will at least give you a chance, and if things do not work out, then he will let you know. As far as how you think you blew it with him, me personally, I am very forgiving, you don’t seem like the forward outgoing type of girl, but perhaps hinting that you don’t mind him as much as you may have said, and working on flirting, you may be able to win him over. I highly doubt he was truly serious about the sister thing, I mean, I don’t do any of that kind of stuff with my sister. Hope I was able to help!


    vvmackvv
    Participant
    June 4, 2014 at 3:09 am #54403

    hes prolly didnt get the signal from you that you like him, thats why he said that.. but see how it goes try to hang out with him again..


    Anonymous
    June 4, 2014 at 9:13 am #54409

    he could be lying, there’s nothing wrong if you ask.


    Stardust
    Participant
    June 4, 2014 at 11:51 am #54406

    Thanks everyone! But I still don’t understand why he would say I was his like his sister unprompted, and weeks later too. And why would he even say that if it wasn’t honest??

    Not to toot my own horn conpletely, but I’ve been told I’m pretty with have a nice personality as well. But Nathaniel you’re right, I’m not an outgoing girl. Yet as long as I think I still have a chance, I’ll try to show a lot more interest.


    Stardust
    Participant
    June 4, 2014 at 11:52 am #54407

    Thanks guys! Maybe you’re right, he didn’t understand I liked him. Or he was trying to save face… But he said it so randomly and weeks later, that it threw me off and hurt me somewhat. Wondering why it was unprompted, and why tell me I’m like a sister now, and not years ago??

    Anyway, not to conpletely toot my own horn, but I’ve been told that I’m pretty, and have a nice personality. So I’ll try to show a lot more interest, if I know I still have a chance.


    Arron W
    Participant
    June 5, 2014 at 12:49 pm #54611

    I dont think you got friendzoned, I think he thinks he got friendzoned


    Confused Al
    Participant
    June 6, 2014 at 6:13 am #54655
    Reply To: Am I stuck in his "friend zone"?

    If you like him well enough, tell him how you feel.


    Stardust
    Participant
    June 6, 2014 at 6:04 pm #54721
    Reply To: Am I stuck in his "friend zone"?

    I wanna know if I’m deep in the friend zone or if there’s a possibility he didn’t mean it what he said to me. That way I can access if it’s worth the risk of telling him my feelings. My concern is not the friendship ending, but of potential awkwardness (I have to see him again if things go sour)…

    So, should I tell him my feelings? I’m ready to walk away if it doesn’t work out.