Am I Too Sensitive?

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Am I Too Sensitive?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    October 10, 2017 at 10:10 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    BlunderBuss
    Participant
    October 7, 2017 at 12:30 am #151874
    Am I Too Sensitive?

    So, my girlfriend has been living with a couple of roommates, two of which are gay guys, and she texted me today, joking that she and one of the guys were engaged. I played along because it was obviously a joke, but I was kinda uncomfortable with it. Partly because I’m kind of a jealous person, and she knows that, and I secretly think that she likes to provoke it, and partly because I have reason to believe she has a crush on this guy. Which again, is still a silly thing to worry about, because he’s gay, but still bothered me. Then she texts me, quoting him, making a joke about having sex with her, and I become extremely uncomfortable. It was a joke, and it was funny, but still, I really didn’t like it, and I didn’t say initially, but it came through in my texts, and she apologized. Am I too sensitive? I know it’s a joke, but she knows that it’s something I’m not comfortable with. Otherwise, we’re very happy together. This just really bothers me. Am I right to feel this way?


    Bella_Berg
    Participant
    October 7, 2017 at 4:15 pm #151884

    You have no control over how things like that make you feel. It’s your actions that you an control. The fact that you are self aware of your jealous tendencies and your girlfriend is as well concerns me in that you seem as though you have made it clear how you feel, and yet she is not respecting that. Regardless of whether he is gay or not, your girlfriend should be respectful and not make unnecessary comments about having sex with another man, because anyone in an exclusive, committed relationship would feel uneasy in that scenario. By the same token, I wouldn’t read too much into it. I act the same way with my friends, especially my gay ones, and I wouldn’t let the tensions build up, because that can go nowhere good. If you are still feeling these negative and uncomfortable feelings, talk to her about it. I’m sure that she will be receptive and want to respect your wishes 🙂 Good luck!


    BlunderBuss
    Participant
    October 7, 2017 at 4:45 pm #151887

    That’s helpful. Thank you.


    MM1973
    Participant
    October 9, 2017 at 8:18 am #151918

    I definitely wouldn’t worry about the situation with her friend itself, however it’s a good opportunity to speak to your girlfriend and reaffirm with how it made you feel. I can imagine that it flatters her that you feel that way, which is possibly why she plays up to it as it makes her feel good. If she cares about you as much as you do her, then I am sure she will get the message and ease off with that kind of behaviour. I don’t think your behaviour is anyting unusual either, largely because I think she is taking liberties with it a bit.


    stoney
    Participant
    October 11, 2017 at 12:17 pm #152452

    You are too sensitive


    LandOD
    Participant
    October 11, 2017 at 2:00 pm #152466

    Look, i lived with two guys who are not gay for a year, meanwhile i was in a relationship. One of my roommates had a girlfriend, the other one didn’t. But that’s not the point. The point is, i was in love with my boyfriend, i was madly in love, so i don’t ever thought about other guy, any guy

    So if you two are great together, and everything is okay when you hang out, there’s probably no reason to worry. You are not to sensitive, you just love her. Her jokes may be inappropriate, but don’t show her that that bothers you, cause you will just cause opposite effect.
    Just relax and enjoy!