Am I wasting my time?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Am I wasting my time?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    oc24
    Participant
    April 21, 2014 at 11:53 am #51561
    Am I wasting my time?

    I’ve been talking to girl now for 4 months. When we first starting talking we both said that we weren’t looking for anything serious and this was going to be just for fun. It has been that till recently. We hadn’t seen each other for about 2 weeks, still talked though. One day she was out with some of her family and we were texting and out of no where she texted me I miss you. I didn’t think anything of it since nothing serious was supposed to come out of this. We talked a bit more that day and she told me to go over to sleep over, so I did. This time though was a bit different. When I would sleep over before, like any FWB situation we would have sex, this time she just wanted my company and for me to lay with her and talk. Which is fine with me but I don’t want to end up getting attached and then get the “this wasn’t anything serious, this was just fun”. Am I just reading too much into it or are these certain little things she’s doing seem like she’s starting to catch feelings?


    oc24
    Participant
    April 21, 2014 at 11:59 am #51562

    This Thursday she asked me what I was looking for in this. I responded honestly and told her I was happy with what we had now, I wouldn’t mind if things got more serious later on. Her response was “I’m not looking for anything serious. Don’t get me wrong I know that what we have is more than just sex. I like the flirting, messing around, joking, sleep overs, talking, chilling and everything.” Kind of misleading to me, basically telling me she wants the relationship without the title or restrictions.

    jeweljillian
    jeweljillian
    Participant
    April 24, 2014 at 7:41 am #51720

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    GraphOfLIfe
    Participant
    April 27, 2014 at 12:26 am #51845

    I understand you enjoy the FWB situation and enjoy talking to her as well. Let me ask you, what would happen if you did get attached? Do you think this is a girl you might have some feelings for or develop over time, or is it strictly physical?

    What’s the downside of getting attached? Think about that, and if you absolutely don’t want anything more than FWB you’ll need to sit down and have a conversation making it clear what you’re looking for wit her.

    If she ends developing more relationship behaviors it will be a problem if you two will not be on the same page, and your FWB arrangement cannot last.

    Again I urge you to take a hard look at if you think you could actually transition into something more with this girl. You may not want a relationship, but maybe if it developed with this person you might end up having a great experience with it.

    Sometimes people fall into your life and disrupt the guidelines you’d set for your love life.