Back off or work harder?

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Back off or work harder?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    tfx
    Participant
    May 19, 2015 at 10:32 am #79271
    Back off or work harder?

    Hi guys,

    I’m getting mixed signals from a girl and now, I can’t decide, whether I should back off for a while or try to work harder and be more patient We are both +- 23 years,she is my schoolmate.We don’t see each other often, because we are both having different timetables and generally we don’t go to school much.

    I liked her for a while (for example half a year, i attended her birthday party where she invited me or events she organized) but I had to solve relationship problems with my ex first. I did was it kind of late, because now, i have almost no time to ask her out face 2 face (exam period, school leaving exams etc). Another problem is that she flies to US for a three months in a month to work & travel.

    So did asked her out via FB for a coffee, she was cool and said yes… without any effort, only one question was enough and now there is a problem, because we do have a problem to settle down a date, when I suggest something…


    tfx
    Participant
    May 19, 2015 at 10:32 am #79272

    … she is usually busy and says something like “we’ll arrange something in the week”, but then she does not respond by herself… she did it about three times and now i don’t know what else to do.

    I do understand that she has virtually no time (job, school, one club at school which organises events, sports, school leaving exams, thesis – i surely know that she doesn’t go out much because of time)… But I don’t understand this behaviour, because on the other hand, when we’re somewhere out, she is cool, smiles, we talk without any problems, sometimes she “accidentaly” touches me (even for a longer time, at the afterparty i was sitting at a bench with my hand at a backrest, she came behind, talked to me, our hands met for a minute or two…), looks at me, in written form she is extending the words (like heey..) and sometimes winks, last week we were even at a afterparty and we got drunk together a lot, talked a lot, the only problem was she was never alone, …


    tfx
    Participant
    May 20, 2015 at 9:41 am #79273

    … because some guys were chasing her too… (tough evening, she is a popular one )

    Another thing may be that she is shy or afraid, she did have only one boy for a five years, they broke up 9 months ago and from that time she did not have anyone, from her words even sexually (she told us while she was drunk including a lot of other personal details – one of those guys was really intrusive).

    So what to do now? She is leaving in a month and the only possibility I know is to meet her face2face is at her thesis defence or state exams… or continue inviting her via FB – for example on my birthday next week, which is our common friend organizing for me as a “surprise”… hm? Or leave it and do nothing except for an occasional chat/wishing luck for exams and try harder in September? I don’t really know. Confused a little bit…

    Thank you! 🙂