Best approach I can take after this?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Best approach I can take after this?

    Author
    Comments

  • Zamov
    Participant
    May 14, 2017 at 7:37 am #136374
    Best approach I can take after this?

    3 years ago i had a crush on this girl and at the start she seemed interested but i didnt know what to do and was too late i guess but we remained friends and i was TOO nice and she didnt seem very appreciative. a year ago she started dating a guy for a few months who was an asshole to her. after they broke up we started talking again and we got very close and she was very nice to me and around that time she met my best friend but I was always the one she would talk to or join for lunch and so i really enjoyed it until i started having feelings again and started behaving too nice which i guess was a turn off for her but still i took her to fancy lunch but i didnt call it a “date” and we passed a rose shop and i got her one and she seemed to like it. but after the lunch she cut me off for 2 months coz she felt awkward at the lunch even after i texted her multiple times and opened up to her that im upset at whats happening she didnt seem to care and i really felt stupid (continued)

    • This topic was modified 1 month, 2 weeks ago by  Zamov.

    Zamov
    Participant
    May 14, 2017 at 7:40 am #136375

    and during the time she ignored me she was really extra friendly to my best friend and then a few weeks ago her friend tells my best friend that this girl i had a crush on has feelings for him and he rejects her completely. so me and my best friend are ignoring her now and after i started actively ignoring her shes starting to be nice again and talk to me regularly but im not replying with more than whats necessary

    i understand my approach was wrong and that girls dont like a guy thats too nice but thats who i am. and i understand she has the right to like whoever she wants and i dont fault her for it. but still i was really hurt especially given i made an effort and she ended up liking my friend who actually found her annoying.

    this whole issue is affecting my relationship with my best friend cause im afraid one day he might find her attractive and make a move. and I dont know how i should behave around her or around him.

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 2 weeks ago by  Zamov.
    May 14, 2017 at 10:20 am #136378

    I’ve been through the exact same thing, in reality, there’s two possibilities of percieving this; Either she’s not interested in you and is interested in your best friend, or she is interested in you and wants to make you jealous. I haven’t really seen this person in real life, so I wouldn’t be able to tell anything from body language, so I wouldn’t know. But to me it seems like she’s into your best friend. I really hate this possibility because i’m going through pretty much the same thing myself. But, it may just be that you’re always around her, and you’re always there for her, and she knows if she comes to you as a last resort, you’ll take her. Stop this, act like you don’t like her, rarely even go around her. What you need to do is make it seem like you like her as little as possible, then she’ll notice you not being there, and then she’ll start to wonder what the heck is going on, and she’ll likely realize her feelings towards you, but ya’ know, there’s always other possibilites.