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howcanitellParticipantJune 8, 2014 at 5:02 am #54746
I’ve had a guy friend for over 9 years. In the course of those 9yrs we have gone out on a few dates. I’m really into him and he always seems like he is into me but then nothing ever comes from it. Like we just seem to stop talking for awhile and then some time passes and he will text me and we start talking again and maybe go out once or twice but nothing comes of it. A few months ago he said he was ready for a real relationship and that he wanted to be with me. I said ok let’s give it a go. But he only texts me once and awhile And keeps saying we should get together but never takes the initiative. I can’t figure out if he’s just being shy(which I know he can be) or what….I really like him but do I seriously have to do everything?? It’s a little confusing. Any advice?
ks5901ParticipantJuly 7, 2014 at 10:55 pm #56842
Nine years is taking it pretty slow but if you truly love him, you should take some more aggressive initiative. Men who are shy find it hard to take much, if any, initiation so you need to evaluate whether or not it’s worth wasting your time with waiting around for him. You’ve been waiting nine years, it’s time to make a move or move on.
confusedgradstudentParticipantJuly 8, 2014 at 5:41 am #56849
I think that he has been taking the initiative by telling you he wants to be with you. Maybe you should tell him that you would like for him to take the action to hang out with you more (don’t accuse him; just tell him what you want and how it makes YOU feel, so that it’s about you and not about him). Tell him that you feel confused because he seems to want to be in a relationship and yet isn’t taking the steps necessary to make it FEEL like it’s actually a real relationship, and see where it goes from there. He sounds like he’s interested, maybe just confused as to what to do! And sometimes a guy needs a girl’s help on that one. 🙂 Good luck!
phoenix7ParticipantJuly 14, 2014 at 10:01 am #57363
Sounds like he’s shy. Maybe he might be afraid that if he’s too aggressive that he’ll scare you away. Even though in this case he should be taking the lead, it might help if you nudge him along if you are at all interested in him.
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