• Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    February 24, 2018 at 9:38 am #166396

    I matched with a guy on bumble two weeks ago. Went on a few great dates, were texting every evening. He was making a lot of effort – driving an hour out of his way to meet up, offering to pay for dinner.. he even brought me a valentines card which he’d ordered online especially (it was a funny one that related to an in-joke we had). He said he’d never hit it off with someone so quickly before, that we were so similar. I thought all was going well and then he just goes quiet. Vague responses to texts and he bailed on the plans we had that weekend without much of an apology or reason. Then finally I get a text saying ‘Hey sorry i’ve been rubbish recently. I don’t think i’m as ready for dating as I thought I was. Which is shit because I think we could probably go somewhere”. He then proceeded to say he was genuinely gutted and can we stay in touch? And wanted to go to the cinema together as friends. I am SO confused. Is he genuinely not ready, or just not that into me?

    February 25, 2018 at 6:48 am #166399


    March 2, 2018 at 10:58 pm #166772

    I just recently started seeing this guy and I was kind of in your position. We were texting and hanging out, having a good time. He all of a sudden didn’t seem interested. It’s hard to understand why some guys seem to like you at first but then just say they aren’t ready to date, when you thought it was going well. He could not be ready to date but doesn’t know how to tell you so he just then shows that he isn’t interested maybe. It’s kind of hard to know the nature of the situation. Maybe more details about how things were going?

    March 4, 2018 at 9:29 am #166781

    Dont over think it.He might just be dating multiple woman to explore his options.You should do the same and then reach out to him him after a couple datea with someone else and then reach out to him

    March 5, 2018 at 11:37 am #166803

    He’s probably just trying to explore his options before he commits to a serious relationship. You should do the same!

    March 6, 2018 at 9:11 pm #166944


    March 6, 2018 at 9:58 pm #166947

    Same thing happened to me about a month ago. It’s a shame because we were great together. I tried reaching out to him after some time and didn’t hear back. In my case, it was okcupid and he really has not logged on in a long time. He had a complicated past…that’s not anyone’s fault. Sometimes it is that they’re not ready but a lot of people have trouble being honest too if they met someone else. I’m sorry.

    March 8, 2018 at 11:17 am #167041

    If you believe that there is a possibility of something happening in the future, then don’t give up. Remain friends and explore other options. As a guy, I have had a girl interested in me when I was completely hung up on someone else. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, so I told her that we could take a step back and spend time as friends. Later, I realized that this girl was really amazing and a relationship with her was something I really wanted, so things worked out in the end.

    March 8, 2018 at 12:17 pm #167060

    my best guess is he decided to take “another offer”… but who knows these days?
    i would let him go and look elsewhere. whatever the reason is the fact is: we now know that he can de-commit to you on a dime and can find reasons to do so. therefore, i would not recommend trying him again as it just means it can happen again, again, again, and again.

    UNLESS he has a completely valid reason that he tells you , and tells you quickly. Or unless he onfides in you something and it turns out there was a complete misunderstanding that without that misunderstanding – none of it would have happened.

    But “lack of explanation” – no. i’d move on.