Confused by this guy's behaviour?

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Confused by this guy's behaviour?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    FreeSpirit2015
    Participant
    January 6, 2015 at 6:36 pm #69993
    Confused by this guy's behaviour?

    I went for a few drinks with a guy just before Christmas and we seemed to hit it off. He asked for my number and we were talking quite a bit over Christmas. He asked if I’d like to ‘go out and get drunk’ with him, but then a few days later when I prompted him about it he couldn’t seem to remember asking me (so he says). We have a lot of mutual friends so we ended up seeing each other yesterday, and he was quite rude to me when we were in a group setting. But when we were both waiting for the bus home alone he seemed anxious initially but then was nice when he warmed up. I don’t know what it is about him which just drives me insane. I don’t think he seems the type to play games, but at the same time his behaviour is not quite stacking up. Sometimes he seems nervous around me, other times he comes across as cold and rude, and other times he’s sweet and nice. I’m young and I don’t have much dating experience, so I apologise if this all seems very childish and naive. Is he a lost cause?

    HVW_Mark
    HVW_Mark
    Participant
    January 7, 2015 at 12:29 am #70003

    Yeh, we would need a little more info perhaps on ages and backgrounds of the people involved to make a better assessment.. But having coached quite a few guys his actions do seem like a few insecurities are coming through. Don’t overthink it too much, keep meeting other people, give him the occasional prompt to see if you can get him to action. He’s either unsure/insecure himself or he is messing with you.. in either case its not a super-desirable scenario right now until he gets hit shit together.


    FreeSpirit2015
    Participant
    January 7, 2015 at 8:51 am #70011

    Thank you for the insight, both!

    lopaze
    lopaze
    Participant
    January 7, 2015 at 7:31 pm #70110

    Based on the information you gave it seems like he’s a little insecure or confused. I wouldn’t put very much time and effort into spending time with him. Move on…


    reyzer100387
    Participant
    January 8, 2015 at 4:19 pm #70151

    His change in mood is likely because he’s interested in you and is wrestling with what to do. That does not mean he is worth chasing. I would say continue as is and if you encounter him again, assess his behavior – he knows you well enough to not be anxious and nervous. If he’s interested you will see it come out next time you meet.

    georgiegirl
    georgiegirl
    Participant
    January 10, 2015 at 11:54 pm #70277

    i also say.. move on…. the fact he asked if you wanted to get drunk with him…..and then he doesn’t remember even asking you????? yea.. right. good luck!


    Anonymous
    January 12, 2015 at 12:53 pm #70304

    Yes move on.. do you want a relationship with someone who you have to think about why they act the way they do?


    FreeSpirit2015
    Participant
    January 12, 2015 at 6:59 pm #70370

    Thanks all for your advice. It is good to have an outside perspective on things like this, and I suspect you all confirmed what I already knew but didn’t want to accept. I’m moving on now and hoping to find a guy who is sure of what he wants from me!