Dating an Indian girl but her family is strict and it's hard to see her. Advice.

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Dating an Indian girl but her family is strict and it's hard to see her. Advice.

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    Henry
    Participant
    May 31, 2016 at 12:49 am #101638
    Dating an Indian girl but her family is strict and it's hard to see her. Advice.

    Now, I am a 33 year old man and the girl I am dating is 20 years old, we have mainly been chatting on Facebook, on Skype, and over the phone, and have known each other about two months. We have only actually had one date in that time which was about three weeks ago and was fantastic. We have made plans to meet three times since then but the plans have fallen through when her parents told her not to go out. She has not told them she has a boyfriend but it is possible they know.

    We nearly broke up yesterday because she had been avoiding me and I was pissed off, finally I got her to chat with me on Facebook and she told me she really likes me and wants to be with me but that it is just too difficult with her family. She says I deserve better etc. I have told her that as long as she wants me I will not walk away and I will do anything in my power to find a way to make this work.

    Such a short word limit, will have to continue below.


    Henry
    Participant
    May 31, 2016 at 12:50 am #101639

    Now, I guess what would be helpful is if anyone here can suggest how I go about this. I would like to either win her parents over, or get her to rebel and move away. Even though it seems very early I actually think I’m in love and have stronger feelings for her already than I had with my ex fianc√© who I was with for four years, so walking away is not an option unless she tells me she isn’t interested.


    Henry
    Participant
    May 31, 2016 at 8:56 am #101640

    If I have to win her parents over I’m not sure what they would expect. I am a catch. I have a good job, money in the bank, I’m handsome etc, they should love me. The only catch might be the age gap if they don’t want their daughter with someone older, or the religious angle because they are Hindu and I have no affiliation with any religion. I don’t really want to do it, but if putting a ring on her finger was the only option to get their approval I would seriously consider it. Like I say, even though it has been a short time I feel more for her than any other woman I’ve dated, and I can tell it would work out.


    Henry
    Participant
    May 31, 2016 at 9:24 am #101641

    If I was the get her to rebel it would be a bit messier as she loves her parents and family despite their oppressive regime. That would simply involve letting her move in with me and I would take care of her. She wouldn’t need to work unless she wanted to. Hopefully in that case it would only be a power play anyway and she would be able to reconcile with her family after a few weeks but now they would be forced to accept me as the power dynamic would have shifted.

    I haven’t heard from her today and have decided to just leave her alone to think about what we discussed yesterday, hopefully will talk to her on the phone tonight though. would appreciate any feedback or suggestions.

    Desmonnd
    Desmonnd
    Participant
    June 3, 2016 at 10:38 am #102087

    Tell her that she had an opportunity to have a white boyfriend, but she blew it. If her family does not like living amongst us, they should move back to the reservation.


    Anonymous
    June 4, 2016 at 11:36 am #102148

    It’s difficult dating within the Asian community. I have first hand experience of this. I don’t think you should do a runner with her that will just mess things up. I think if you really like each other, the parents have to know. If she really likes you she will somehow tell her parents else the relationship will just strain and wither. Good luck and tc