Dilemma – All in or All Out?


Dilemma – All in or All Out?

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    September 14, 2015 at 2:05 pm #85400
    Dilemma – All in or All Out?

    So this girl I used to date (and liked quite a lot) messaged me out of the blue 2 months ago, since then we’ve kind of been hanging out casually – maybe once a week, although were both busy and we’ve gone as much as 2 weeks without seeing each other. She’s definitely into me (we’ve had sex already, if it matters) but she is also dating at least one other guy. I’m pretty sure she just went away the other weekend with him, we’re supposed to hang out this week now that she’s back.

    I’m a bit pissed that she went away with another guy, but I know if I openly say that she’ll likely just get cold on me. She also has this thing where she says she will never text a guy first, so waiting her out may not be the best. Options?

    September 14, 2015 at 2:09 pm #85401

    1) Business as usual. She doesn’t think I know that she went away with another guy, and theoretically just because she did doesn’t mean she likes him more than me. I message her after shes back a day or so, and arrange another date, hide my frustrations.

    2) Ignore her. Our last date went pretty well, it was just before she left for the weekend. She’s likely expecting to hear from me, she’ll probably find it a bit curious if she doesn’t. I guess my end game here could be to get her to message me. If she does, well, obviously she must like me more than this other guy? I would need to come up with a reason as to why I have her the cold shoulder….

    3) Call her on it, and tell her I’m not thrilled with it. Risky move, I’m leaning away from this one.

    September 15, 2015 at 8:17 am #85420

    2 or 3 if she really likes you that much she would not just go out for a whole weekend with another guy and just only give you once a week, it also depends what you want out of the relationship if you don’t give a crap and just want to fuck then there you go don’t tell her but if you want to actually have a real relationship then deff call her out on it and hear what she has to say

    September 16, 2015 at 8:24 am #85485

    I honestly would tread very carefully in this situation. The only girl I’ve ever sort of been with did this to me and it really consumed my thoughts all day long. Turns out I was just a fallback guy when she started fighting with her on and off again boyfriend. I found this out through mutual friends, she never mentioned it to me at all. I dropped her right away before I got too involved with her, because I’m not the sort of guy to go for “flings”. It really sucked to find out I was just a fallback. And when I read your scenario, it sounds a little similar to mine. So that’s my advice, tread very carefully, and I would either call her out or ignore her.