Disappearing Act should i try

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Disappearing Act should i try

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    whaleman12
    Participant
    January 5, 2015 at 6:40 pm #69936
    Disappearing Act should i try

    I started dating a girl several months back. We hit it off, went on several dates and stayed in constant communication. Then suddenly she disappeared. Months later she contacted me stating she had personal things to deal with. I didnt dig to deap, accepted her reasoning and we started talking again. We went on several dates and had many conversations. I thought things were going well. But then poof she disappeared again. I haven’t been able to get in touch with her for several weeks now. Ive considered sending her flowers to her job to get her attention and possibly reconnect. Im leaning on not doing it thinking it may be creepy or stalkerish or not well recieved. What are your thoughts?

    Roxy
    Roxy
    Participant
    January 6, 2015 at 3:42 am #69943

    So you know her for quite a few months now and have been on numerous dates. This is second time she has disappeared and it’s not like it’s just been a week or two but a significant amount of time for someone your dating. Sounds to me either she is using you or because of her personal reasons shouldn’t be dating at all. You being very understanding a bit too understanding. If I wasn’t in a position to date someone I would tell them rather than do a disappearing act.


    elena_j1988
    Participant
    January 6, 2015 at 2:23 pm #69964

    It’s possible you are not the only person she’s dating. Maybe things are getting more serious with her other prospects and therefore she disregards you. I would wait it out and maybe look to date other people.


    Anonymous
    January 7, 2015 at 8:50 am #69968

    Shes showing you you’re not a priority, so I wouldn’t do flowers. Although very sweet, if she can so easily disappear, flowers aren’t going to change anything. If she truly cared, or felt close to you, she’d tell you whats going on. My gut tells me there’s someone else. Good luck!!


    Anonymous
    January 7, 2015 at 8:50 am #69969

    Although I appreciate the gesture, it seems to me shes showing you you’re not a priority. And flowers aren’t going to change that. If you were close in her mind, she’d feel comfortable telling you whats going on!! My intuition tells me shes seeing someone else.

    HVW_Mark
    HVW_Mark
    Participant
    January 7, 2015 at 11:54 pm #70113

    +1 to what Elena said. Most DEF no flowers!! Have you slept together? I’m assuming not.

    If not, there’s nothing much here, move on.

    Hayley Matthews
    Hayley Matthews
    Moderator
    January 9, 2015 at 4:28 pm #70239

    You bring up a good point @HVW_Mark.

    lopaze
    lopaze
    Participant
    January 11, 2015 at 12:06 am #70278

    She either has a boyfriend or some other guy she is emotional attached too. I wouldn’t spend to much time and effort to be around someone like her. At best she would be a good time girl and nothing else because in reality she is using YOU.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by lopaze lopaze.

    rafterman
    Participant
    January 11, 2015 at 6:05 pm #70282

    Agreed w/ what Elena said. Also, are there any of her friends you could reach out to for more info? If not, move on I suppose.


    wannyxoxo
    Participant
    January 13, 2015 at 8:45 am #70385
    Reply To: Disappearing Act should i try

    Leave her be. Dont be a doormat to someone. When someone have that “disappearing act” attitude, they can do it again and again to us. Cus we allow them. Move on.. And find someone else worth your time:)


    homebynow
    Participant
    January 14, 2015 at 12:01 am #70541
    Reply To: Disappearing Act should i try

    It is impossible to tell what her reason is for disappearing, if it has to do with her feelings for you, with seeing someone else, or with another unrelated issue in her life. However, the relevant thing here is that she is not consistent in your interactions. She will be there, and then disappear without an explanation. Ask yourself if this is the kind of thing you want in a relationship and if you really can grow anything from there. Beyond that, it hints at something very difficult in her life which may be going in if you can’t even reach her. Since you have tried to reach her, and you can’t, I say try your best to let it go. If she comes back around and you are still interested, have a kind, but serious conversation with her about her intentions with you. Trying beyond that to reach her won’t change a thing…she clearly doesn’t (or can’t) be found right now, and you would not gain a single thing.

    From a girl