Every time I message her, it gets a little less likely

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Every time I message her, it gets a little less likely

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    BlunderBuss
    Participant
    February 3, 2017 at 3:51 pm #125670
    Every time I message her, it gets a little less likely

    I’m having trouble getting this girl to go out with me. I straight up asked her out on a date, and she said yes. The first time I asked was a few weeks ago. We’re both in college, but different colleges, and winter break was coming up, and so the timing just didn’t work out. She told me she’d like to when break is over though, that she really is interested. I said okay, I’ll message her then. So I did. I asked her if she was free on a specific day, and she said maybe, that she’s been swamped with homework. The day before she texts me saying that she doesn’t think she’ll be able to.
    I said “I understand. We can do this another time.”
    To which she said, “I’m so sorry about this, thank you for understanding.”
    I’m left with the impression that I still have a chance, but I know that if I ask again there’s a chance of looking desperate. But at the same time, if I don’t message her soon, she’ll probably forget about me. How do I approach this? My last interaction with her was 6 days ago.

    F1end
    F1end
    Participant
    February 3, 2017 at 4:23 pm #125671

    She’s wasting your time, and keeping you in a holding pattern.

    Actually, you are also keeping yourself in a holding pattern.

    Stop worrying about the chance you have with her, and consider how much of a chance she has left with you.

    See the difference?

    If this is your only option, then you need to work on cultivating your options. Not on getting an uninterested woman out on a date.

    She should be quite low down your list. If you don’t have a list, start creating one.

    F1end
    F1end
    Participant
    February 3, 2017 at 4:23 pm #125673

    You’re very likely wasting your time.

    Work on getting other options.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    February 3, 2017 at 5:06 pm #125696

    if they are interested they will usually counter-propose a timeframe like, “but after finals definitely.. my last final is wednesday.”
    she did not do this and let you go open-ended. that typically means lack of interest.

    sorry.


    E3ZY219
    Participant
    February 3, 2017 at 10:10 pm #125713

    Again I agree with F1end. She is wasting your time, and only wanting to go out if it is convenient for her or if it benefits her. I was in your situation at one point, and the best thing I did was cut that girl off. My time was valuable and precious, and she was disrespecting me by not being considerate of my time. This girl is definitely wasting your time, and I have no reason to say she’s not. I would keep shopping around if I was you, and not worry about her anymore.


    jillianfrances
    Participant
    February 4, 2017 at 12:06 am #125716

    She sounds like she’s not worth the trouble, if she liked you enough she would at least have given you another day that would work for a date instead, rather than just telling you she couldn’t do it and nothing else. I’m sorry 🙁


    BlunderBuss
    Participant
    February 4, 2017 at 7:01 pm #125729

    I think you guys are right. It’s not that I don’t have other options, but as long as I’m not about to become exclusive with someone else, it felt like a waste to let her go if she seemed interested. But your right. This isn’t getting me anywhere.