Found her with another guy…

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Found her with another guy…

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 13, 2015 at 9:31 pm #70535
    Found her with another guy…

    The post was super long and wouldn t fit in here so I posted it on another forum: http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=489926&p=6205871#post6205871

    This is the first girl I’ve really gotten to know since I started high school. I don’t know what it was about her that made me interested in her but now I don t know what to do.


    SupaJones
    Participant
    January 13, 2015 at 10:34 pm #70536

    I understand your dilemma.

    Let’s get some things straight:
    1) You are most definitely emotionally attached to this female.
    2) You, like every other guy, has no idea what he is doing.
    3) You have very limited opportunities and options.

    So, here’s my solution to your problem. Since you go to the same school and used to text and stuff, you are not out of the game yet. You see her alone: Walk fast and before you get to her say her name. Cindy, daisy, carla, whatever it may be. Say hi/hey/hello and present yourself with your head held up high. Say who you are, talk about the texts you sent, and say that you would really like to get the chance to know her better. If she isn’t willing to date two people, she will say this (I think).

    ^This is a high percentage option that will leave you with a rejection, a wait time period, a yes; but an answer
    More importantly, you will learn from this and gain experience talking to women you are fond of.

    If she seems uninterested, so be it.


    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 13, 2015 at 11:22 pm #70540

    Thanks for the advice. Someone recommended me to do this: “If you want to give it one last try – approach her in person. Tell her “I saw you another day with the guy. I assumed you guys are dating, is it true?” Give her time to respond. If she asks why you are interested, tell her “I liked you and wanted to ask you out myself but now I see it is probably not a good idea.” Make a pause and see what she says. If she is not saying anything at all, tell her “I’ll see you around” and leave the scene”. I know it would best to do this face to face but the odds that she is ever alone is very low. Every time I see her, its either right before or during lunch and shes always with at least 2 of her friends. It would be super awkward if I just go up her and start talking to her about this in front of her friends. Would you recommend me texting her this instead as a last resort?


    SupaJones
    Participant
    January 14, 2015 at 8:55 am #70553

    You might be able to ask her “for some help” or just ask her if you could talk one on one.
    I really don’t know the ‘best’ option for you but any option is better nothing.

    If your time runs out, then you might as well just text her and give you+her an option for her.

    So… what the hell. There’s 3B girls in the world and you are a man. Remember that.

    19Zach97
    19Zach97
    Participant
    January 14, 2015 at 3:36 pm #70618

    It seems like you are too attached to her. Give it a little time and see if you are still infatuated with her.


    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 15, 2015 at 8:47 am #70664

    I really want to thank ya’ll for your advices, it really is cheering me up know that there are people out there helping others in situations like this.
    I’m going to go up to her next tuesday and be straight up with her with my true intentions as my last ditch effort, if she things don’t turn out well, I’ll just forget about her.
    Also, this is a little update, i caught her staring at me for a good 2-3 minutes today during lunch (she sits at a table across from mine, about 10-20 feet away), I was doing some homework and didn’t look up but i could see her staring from the corner of my eye. Also, yesterday she posted a paragraph about how she doesn’t have to words to make “you” feel better, but she has the arms to give “you” a hug, etc., I don’t want to say this might be related to me or whatnot, but it sure is coincidental. Or it could just be me.


    SupaJones
    Participant
    January 17, 2015 at 12:59 am #71189

    Yeah, I get these hints too here and there. I’m never quite sure about whom these are aimed towards. Hard to really gauge her system to see if she is actually trying to send you a real message or not. I really like your attitude and I think a lot of dudes could learn from a guy like you. Best of luck.


    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 18, 2015 at 9:58 am #71207

    Thanks man. I’ll put up a update on how things turn out on Tuesday.


    Scooby Rex
    Participant
    January 19, 2015 at 9:58 am #71233
    Reply To: Found her with another guy…

    First, I truly wish you the best of luck with her.

    Second, you are in high school. In my experience (I’m 45) at least in to a female’s 20’s they are still looking for the “cool” guy. So, I would suggest playing it cool. Let her know that you like to be around her. You enjoy her company. Text in a friendly manner and always keep your cool and keep it positive. Don’t complain or whine or complain around her, about her, or to anyone that she knows.

    Third, maybe one in a thousand high school relationships are permanent relationships. The natural thing that high-schoolers do is find out their self worth by how others interact with them. A high school girl will at a minimum flirt with other guys if not outright date other guys. Still want this girl to be yours? Then you should probably expect this and continue without being disappointed when she is with another guy. Have the confidence and show the confidence that you will still be with her in the end (but don’t tell her this).


    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 21, 2015 at 9:53 pm #71499
    Reply To: Found her with another guy…

    First off, thanks for the uplifting responses and advice.
    Now, the update, so I texted her on Monday, MLK Day, we didn’t have school, and I asked her if we could talk privately on Tuesday during school and she said sure. So Tuesday comes around, I texted her during lunch and asked if we could meet up somewhere and talk (away from her friends), she texted back and said she was doing math, I was going to go up to her table and talk to her but didn’t have the balls. This pretty much set the tone of her attitude that she wasn’t interested and I was 80% sure it wasn’t going to work out, but I still wanted to get the final answer. So Wednesday (today) comes around and I go up to her table and ask her if I could talk to her privately. She said sure and we walk into one of the empty hallways and I ask her if she was taken. There was a pause, then she said she was, welp, fuck me; at least, she did it quickly and swiftly.


    lexrunner408
    Participant
    January 21, 2015 at 9:57 pm #71501
    Reply To: Found her with another guy…

    Thankfully, ya’ll convinced me she wasn’t worth it and she was never interested in me in the first place, so it didn’t hit me as hard. I’m already over it, but this has really crippled my confidence and I don’t know if I have the time to ever find a prom date before my senior year ends. Overall, today has been a shit day for me. Pretty much got rejected, then lost my phone during practice, then cut my cheek from weight lifting, hopefully something good happens later on in the week for me. But I love ya’ll and this community; wish more heart-broken people knew about this site and this amazing community. I’ll probably be back in a few weeks or months having trouble with another girl. But for now, I just really want ya’ll to know that you guys are awesome!