Frustrated and confused


Frustrated and confused

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    May 1, 2014 at 9:41 pm #52123
    Frustrated and confused

    Earlier this week I had the most amazing first date and now I can’t seem to get a hold of the girl.

    Got a message from a girl this past weekend. I was hesitant as she is quite a bit younger than me, 34 and 23. She said that she likes guys my age as they know what they want. It sounded like we were looking for the same things, so why not. We went out Monday night, and it was the best first date I’ve ever been on.

    The date quickly started going very well. In all we were together for over two hours and never had a pause or moment of silence. We had the same interests and there was some real chemistry. Half way through the date she started planning the second! I decided to be bold and found an excuse to move in and kiss her which she liked and couldn’t stop smiling. As the night went one she kept inching closer and I could see her getting more comfortable. At the end she confirmed the second date and told me to call her later in the week to finalize the plans.

    May 1, 2014 at 9:43 pm #52124

    Before leaving the lounge we kissed again which at this point felt very natural.

    I walked her to her car and when we got there will kissed about a half dozen more times (which she moved in first for) and she gave me a big hug and really pulled me in tight and didn’t let go for at least a half minute.

    Well, it’s now Thursday night and I haven’t been able to get in touch with her. I knew I was going to be extremely busy Tuesday and Wednesday and wouldn’t be free until late, so Tuesday night I sent her a quick little text to say hello and ask her how she was doing. No response. Tonight I called her and it rang until it hit her voicemail. It’s been over two hours and nothing from her. Should I give up? My thinking that if I hadn’t heard from her by lunch tomorrow (our second date is supposed to be Saturday) to send her a message on the site we met on just in case there was an issue with her phone or something. (Her screen was smashed up so who knows) Or did I wildly misread our date?

    May 2, 2014 at 12:21 pm #52132

    Wow, that sucks. People are unpredictable. I have so many stories like this from dating, especially online dating. Sorry that she is doing a 180. I really don’t think there is any excuse for her behavior. Unfortunately, you probably have to chalk it up to the fact that she is 23, and no matter how much she says that she knows what she wants, its likely that she really doesn’t. She could have unfortunately, just been in the moment on the date – then realized it could turn into something serious, and got scared. That’s what it sounds like to me, unfortunately. I’d give myself some time to get over it, and then maybe try dating other people when you feel better.

    May 3, 2014 at 6:20 pm #52152

    Yeah I’m sorry man. I’m going through something very similar and it really sucks. Girls show feelings in different ways than we do and sometimes it seems like they are feeling what we are feeling and then all of a sudden there is nothing. I don’t really understand it. All I can say is that a few months ago I was on the other side for the first time ever. I met a girl that I really started to crush on hard for a few days. We were texting constantly and she was really into me. She would drive an hour to see me a few times a week. Then I started to withdraw because I sort of just realized I wasn’t as into her as I thought. She tried really hard to figure out what was going on and kept trying to get together with me. The difference between me and the girls that have done this same thing to me is that I had the balls to tell her what was up. I told her that I didn’t think it was good idea to see each other anymore and that was it. Girls don’t seem to be very good at that.