girl 'friend' cheated on her boyfriend with me

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girl 'friend' cheated on her boyfriend with me

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    nayf82
    Participant
    May 19, 2015 at 5:37 pm #79347
    girl 'friend' cheated on her boyfriend with me

    I have been working with a younger girl for over a year now, we have become great friends, we seem to share almost the same interests/tastes in everything which seems unbelieveably uncanny at times. We have never fallen out, we work closely together and have become almost un-separable whilst at work, much to the amusement of our collegaues. We are both quite shy but we joke around a lot with each other and she seems to find everything I say/do funny which always seems a good starter. I am however 32 and she is 19 which a lot of people reading this will say is wrong to start with I am sure, I would say the same thing if I was reading someone elses profile, but I just cant help the way I feel about her and I know she has feelings for me. Probably without such an age gap things might have come to a head a bit sooner. Anyhow, she also has a boyfriend of a year, she never seems to bring him up in conversation with me too much and when she does she often implys that she prefers hanging out..


    nayf82
    Participant
    May 19, 2015 at 5:45 pm #79349

    ..with me. Things happened to a head recently when we had arranged to go to London to see a music gig together, we had booked it 2 months in advance and we both kept talking about how excited we were waiting for the big day. The chemistry/tension between us had been building up between us by the time the date came. The day before the gig she had told me how she had fallen out with her boyfriend as she had not told him she was going away for the weekend, she then told him she was going away with a girlfriend. We got to the gig in london, had a few drinks and then the two of us danced away at the front of the crowd, about 2 songs in I kissed her and then I seemed to be kissing her for the next 2 hours during the gig, and on the walk/train all the way back to the hotel. It was perfect, I was in heaven and I know she looked at me with the same love in her eyes as I had for her. We got back to hotel, I thought we might just kiss some more but she then inititiated sex and the moment was…


    nayf82
    Participant
    May 20, 2015 at 9:41 am #79350

    …away with us, again it was perfect and passionate, I couldnt have dreamt it better. We held each other in our arms and she told me she was happy and that she had no regrets and I could tell she was genuine. The next day she was totally different, she was very quite (she is very shy sometimes and can sink into deep quietness) she said she was ok but I could tell it wasn’t. I told her again how perfect I thought she was and how I wanted to be with her, I knew she had a boyfriend she might have to deal with and I knew me being older be problem. In the 3 days since I have asked her through texts, short conversations at work what she is thinking and she’s been very slow to say anything, she has given me the cold shoulder. I have sort of forced it out of her today, she says she is unsure about us still! but that she still loves her boyfriend. So I have said I will leave her alone, that ive told her how I feel and that maybe we should be friends again, I bloody love her, any advice?!?


    Horton
    Participant
    May 21, 2015 at 12:37 am #79449

    I subscribe to the belief that you can’t make someone love you. You let her know how you feel. She has to make up her mind. Give her some distance and time. If she wants to be with you she knows where to find you. At some point you may need to move on and start the healing process.

    Also I hate to say it but if she cheated on her boyfriend with you, I consider that a red flag.