Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

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Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    EBarbz
    Participant
    March 1, 2017 at 1:48 pm #128684
    Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    So I have been dating my girlfriend for 7 months. Crazy about her. And she is about me. Says she loves me. Talks about eventually moving in together down the road etc.

    One thing that kind of bothers me, is that she will always ask if my best friend will be hanging out with us, if we ever go out.

    My best friend is in a relationship, and has been for over a year.
    They both are happy.
    My girlfriend has met both in the past, at partys etc.

    Whenever we go out with friends or to an event, my girlfriend will ask if he will be there.
    Example is we are going out of town for St. Paddys day, and my girlfriend asked if my friend was also joining.

    Am I thinking too much into this, or should I be concerned.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 1, 2017 at 5:11 pm #128720

    definitely no way that can be a positive sign of any kind.
    but it doens’t mean it’s a negative sign.

    can you tell us more about what she specifcially asks and how often and if she asks for more details than what you’ve told us? Or is it always just “will he be there” whenever you guys are goin out with friends?

    thanks.


    EBarbz
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 8:48 am #128748

    Its not an everyday thing. Just times when there is an event/gathering of some kind. Usually if the plans involve multiple people, she will ask.
    She doesn’t ask for more details after the yes or no.

    A number of us are going out of town, for the St. Paddys Parade. She asked if he is going.
    Around Christmas we had Ugly sweater event. She asked if he was going.
    She asked if we were hanging out with him on New Years.
    Times like that.
    She will specially ask about him, not any other friends.

    She mentions she thinks he is a cool guy, and “likes” him, in the sense that he seems like a nice guy and not a jerk

    RoxOli
    RoxOli
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 8:48 am #128746

    Yeah, I would like to know more to be able to help…


    Jack of Hearts
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 10:41 am #128794

    I wouldn’t say it’s completely normal, but it may not necessarily be something malicious. I think the best thing is to put her in the hot seat. Ask her why she keeps asking about it, not in a interrogative way, but casually bring it up. See what her response is and how honest she seems with it.


    EBarbz
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 11:22 am #128813

    I wanted to bring it up. But I have been holding back. Didn’t know if I should. I don’t want to start something unnecessary if it is

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 1:53 pm #128835

    last question.. does she ask about anybody else?
    i lied.. another last question. does she give any reaction when you say “yes” vs “no” to him coming or not?

    Thanks.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 1:54 pm #128836

    yeah don’t bring it up yet. let’s get a better feel for it first… for now.. just keep noticing how she behaves and any pattersn when it comes to this guy vs your other friends. that’s where the answer will lie


    EBarbz
    Participant
    March 2, 2017 at 3:08 pm #128865

    No doesn’t ask about anyone else.
    Response is usually “ohh cool”. No other questions.

    Whenever we hang out, she always only hangs around me. Never talks by herself or do anything suspicious


    Jack of Hearts
    Participant
    March 3, 2017 at 9:00 am #128822

    If you believe it may be unnecessary, it makes me think that you should wait a bit longer to see how things progress. If it starts to eat at you, and you hold it in, trust me, it’s going to blow up. Better to talk about it while your calm, cool and collected, rather than after it escalates and you lash out.

    I just gave you contradictory advice, but I don’t know exactly how you feel about it. If you think you can stay calm a bit longer, do so, but don’t let it get to a point where you blow up.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 3, 2017 at 5:59 pm #129066
    Reply To: Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    how does she act towards him during these gorup outtings and he’s there?
    is there a difference in the way she acts when he’s not there?


    EBarbz
    Participant
    March 6, 2017 at 10:01 am #129138
    Reply To: Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    No difference. Just small talk. Conversations only usually last a few minutes. She will never go off on her own. Will always hang around me.


    Bittersweet90
    Participant
    March 7, 2017 at 11:04 am #129248
    Reply To: Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    So have you asked her yet??

    Does your friend ever mention her whenever you and him hang out??


    Johnny
    Participant
    March 9, 2017 at 8:58 am #129524
    Reply To: Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    I would like to share my experience with you.
    My gf used to mention a guy. I started to count and about say 5 to 6 times in say one morning. One day I can wait and just ask her. She admitted that she is thinking of him sometimes otherwise she will not mention him quite frequently. We are still bf/gf but I knew she is not that into me.


    dutchrose
    Participant
    March 9, 2017 at 2:25 pm #129629
    Reply To: Girlfriend constantly asks about my best friend

    I advice you to just ask her. Don’t be mad when you ask, just ask friendly!