Help navigating the first few dates

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Help navigating the first few dates

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  • AlexxA
    Participant
    May 3, 2017 at 9:43 am #135251
    Help navigating the first few dates

    Met this guy on match.com. We hit it off. He asked me out after a few days. We made a plan, but he had to postpone twice due to scheduling conflicts. We kept texting and talking on the phone for three weeks. He finally committed to a day and time. We met for our first date. He took me to a really nice restaurant, we ate and drank. He wanted to take me out for ice cream after, something I put I enjoyed on my profile. He also referenced a bunch of things that were on my profile. It was a great date. We laughed, talked, and really seemed into each other. He kissed me on the cheek and on the head. He called me right after the date to talk to me on the phone and said he wanted to see me again and I assured him I felt the same. We texted and talked for a few days and then made a plan to go hiking. He said he was free all morning, until later when he might hangout with a buddy. I was so excited to see him again. But hiking seemed rushed and he didn’t seem totally engaged the whole time.


    AlexxA
    Participant
    May 3, 2017 at 9:53 am #135252

    He asked me to coffee after hike. Halfway through he says sorry, starts texting. He tells me he has to run because he has to hang out with his friend. It was a bit rude, but he did warn me. It was awkward. He walks me to my car, gives me a big hug, and tells me he will definitely be talking to me soon & I shouldn’t be a stranger. He texts me after to make sure I got home safe. We have been texting/flirting ever since for two days. I said how I was busy coming up, but hope to have some time to spend with him. He then seemed interested and starts naming things we could do for another date, letting me pick. We get side tracked texting and never pick a date/time. I’m just confused as to why he isn’t calling me or trying to pin me down for time. We text all day while we are at work. He said he struggled with anxiety and depression. My friends think he may just be anxious and trying not to be pushy. I feel like I am slightly chasing him now, and his not putting in as much effort as 1st meet.


    isabellahg
    Participant
    May 3, 2017 at 2:43 pm #135293

    I’ve come to think that we all might have a degree of anxiety and depression as we grow older 🙁
    He sounds like he is into you though so congrats! 🙂
    My advice is to keep talking to him, it’s not like he’s pulling away at all, I know you might wanna see him again right away, but he will make the move eventually, meanwhile let him know you’re going out with your girls, post pics on social media, and if after a couple of weeks he still doesn’t ask you out then there is nothing wrong for you to take the first step, if he likes you he won’t be bothered but flattered, and if he says yes then tell him it’s his duty to plan the next date 🙂


    AlexxA
    Participant
    May 4, 2017 at 12:05 pm #135387

    We are still talking. He asked about doing something Saturday, as we had mentioned me coming to his area to do this certain activity together. He then tells me that he has plans later in the day to drink with his buddy and go see this movie they really want to see, so we will have to do our activity and lunch earlier.

    I kind of felt weird about this. I felt squeezed into his life. Like I have to rush and hurry because he has to run off to hang with his guy friend? Am I overthinking this? Am I wrong for wanting to feel a little bit more of a priority? I have to drive a good 45 minutes to his house for us to do one activity and lunch and then I have to leave because he has plans.

    So I told him that he seems very busy for us to squeeze everything in, and I don’t want to have to rush it. He then said he is going to check with his friend and see what is going on and then we could always move it to Sunday if that works better.

    He answered me saying Saturday is free and clear and we ar