Hopelessly Confused

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Hopelessly Confused

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  • worldwindwendy
    Participant
    June 6, 2017 at 7:56 pm #138663
    Hopelessly Confused

    Recently I’ve been dating a guy for 2.5 months…. we both came from very hurtful relationships…. he hasn’t been in a seriously relationship for 4 yrs and I haven’t been in a relationship for 3 yrs…. however we were introduced and hit it off very well, actually scary well (is that even a word)…. we were with each other just about every day…. I enjoyed his company and he enjoyed mine…. the first 2 months of dating he would come to my house and we didn’t turn on the tv or pay attention to our phones we just talked and learned about each other…. the only flaw I’ve encountered was when he left, he would go all day without communication…. the thought of cheating never crossed my mind because he was always at my house…. he allowed me to answer his phone when busy not knowing who was calling and introduced me to many of his friends and family…. it just all moved so fast…. I didn’t mind tho I was falling fast…. the whole day without communication really bothered me and I


    worldwindwendy
    Participant
    June 6, 2017 at 8:02 pm #138664

    Mentioned to him a few times and his reply would be to bare with him bc the relationship thing was all new to him again if I could be patient…. I tried and it was like every other week it would happen I even let it go sometime even tho I was pissed…. I recently received very bad news and I waited for him to call but no call no text…. I didn’t want to bother him bc of his job…. when he did contact me a day later I was busy and couldn’t answer his call…. when I eventually had time to reply to him I lashed out and nagged him about the same situation he asked for me to be patient with him for…. we argued and he suggested we needed space…. I haven’t heard from him in about a week….
    I want to contact him but he suggested space not sure what to do…. I’m not even sure I want a relationship but I do know I love his companionship and I want that back and what ever happens happens…. I’m not even sure he will miss me….!!
    HELP

    Kenneth87
    Kenneth87
    Participant
    June 6, 2017 at 8:53 pm #138666

    Anyone who knows me knows I’m terrible at keeping up with social media and my phone in general. I do those kinda things when I have a clear head for it and nothing to disturb me. One of my friends is even more extreme. He deliberately ignores the phone if he is doing something else as he doesn’t want it controlling his life.

    If he feels you’ve violated his right to do that and that you’ve been pushy, it’s better to either realize that and apologize and then give him the space he asked for along with an open invitation. That way he knows you’re serious.

    If you can’t do that it’s going to be hard to have something with the guy.

    You can’t even be sure that he’s going to want it this way always. This may just be his way of getting to know you. In big doses and then time for the rest of his life. The future could look more like that of a traditional couple.

    There’s no way he won’t miss some of the things about being with you, but some people require a larger amount of privacy than others. Maybe he’s even still a bit marked by his previous relationship.

    • This reply was modified 2 weeks, 2 days ago by Kenneth87 Kenneth87.
    • This reply was modified 2 weeks, 2 days ago by Kenneth87 Kenneth87.

    worldwindwendy
    Participant
    June 7, 2017 at 10:02 am #138669

    Thank you for you reply…. @kenneth87
    He def has things to do and after he replied I did realize that and I apologized… however he is def the type of person who doesn’t do well with displaying his feelings because of his past relationship…. I’m not sure even if he did want to reach out he will… apparently I was the first (lucky) lady for him in 4 yrs… and I feel as if I ruined it… I apologized a week ago and still nothing… I will try my best to hold out on contacting him even tho it’s killing me….