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KavaParticipantNovember 20, 2014 at 3:32 pm #67837
This summer a guy from work was flirting with me a lot, and tried to convince me to date him. As per my no dating at work rule, I said he’d need to prove himself in order for me to break my rule. We became friends, all the while he promised he’d wait for me and convince me in the end to date him. We had great times as friends, and finally we started sleeping together as well after a month of “dating”. After a small vacation in September, I asked him if he still wanted to date me, and he broke my heart by saying no, that his feelings were over, and that we shouldn’t be together. For a month we didn’t talk, and I had to see him at the office every few days, which killed me. After a month we started to talk again, said we’d be good friends again, and started hanging out. But now I see he started a flirtation with another girl at work, who I think is sleeping with him. He ignores my texts, and I can’t stop crying now, thinking it’s really over, even as friends. How can I get over it?!
ckmmepdParticipantNovember 21, 2014 at 7:20 pm #67950
Try to identify and give a name to what you are feeling, it can help you feel more in control of what is happening. It might sound silly, but time also helps.
JChristieParticipantDecember 2, 2014 at 9:14 am #68469
the best way to move on is to recognize the valuable lesson to be learned from that experience.
1. you’re no dating work guys is a good rule
2. a lot of guys enjoy the chase. they can come on strong like they want sex, but it is just a form of flirtation. don’t be fooled by his attempts to get
you in the sack. keep the next guy chasing after the “goodies”. they will think you are ‘cheap’ if you sleep with them too fast.
3. having fun and being compatible with someone is not always the same. get clear on what you like to do and do it. you will likely meet guys who are doing it too. at least then, you will have some form of common ground, other than just having fun. to spend our life with someone, we want someone who makes us feel good about ourselves, but more important, we want someone who shares our values, our interests and our way of life.
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