How to tell a guy you want to have sex – through text – long distance

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How to tell a guy you want to have sex – through text – long distance

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    calicomoth
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 6:45 am #153787
    How to tell a guy you want to have sex – through text – long distance

    Went to high school with a gorgeous guy 8 years ago, tho we never hung out in person. We have texted off and on since then, recently started texting again. He travels around in nearby states a lot, comes to my town sometimes. We find each other attractive, we have told this to each other while flirting a bit. He has talked about moving here. However I’m still not sure if he thinks of me as a possible relationship. Im worried that if he decides he doesnt want a relationship, he might stay away all together, assuming that I want one.
    How do I tell him that I want to have sex no strings attached, or if he wants to take it further like a relationship, Im down. Again, it has to be through a text I cant tell him in person. I want to tell him I want him but I dont want to sound desperate or sound like I sleep around a lot. (My few relationships were 4+ yrs).
    I will comment part 2 below.


    calicomoth
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 6:46 am #153788

    Part 2.
    Weve lightly flirted but Im scared to take it further, maybe it’s too early. There’s also a part of me that is worried if I wait too long, I’ll loose my chance before I even tell him that I don’t expect a relationship from him. This isnt a womanizer that sleeps with a lot of women. He can also be very shy. I fear that if I straight up told him I wanted to have sex with him it would sound dirty and push him away. I want to tell him something that isnt too forward but forward enough for him to get the point that A. I want to have sex. B. He doesnt have to commit. And C. He should get to town ASAP.
    Maybe saying something like
    “Im not expecting you to just move here if Im the only person you know in town, but I must tell you that Ive thought about you a lot, you are downright gorgeous and it’d be amazing if you came through town and we could kick it, even for just a day… preferably a night 😉 whatever happens after that is cool with me..”
    Part 3. Below (sorry)


    Calicomoth.
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 7:19 am #153791

    Part 3.
    Id send that right now if I had the guts, but it still seems too blunt, I’m worried about scaring him off for good & ruining my chances.
    Any suggestions of what I could say exactly, or any advice on how I should proceed would be greatly appreciated. Maybe it’s too soon, I don’t know. He talked about coming to visit soon. Maybe part of me wants to make sure he knows this, maybe it will give him more incentive to visit even. I’m just so unsure how to do this. I haven’t had sex in nearly two years since my last relationship. But I’ve never wanted someone physically so bad, it’s a new, weird feeling and I can’t help but to fantasize about him and think about it a lot.
    I got logged out now it’s saying wrong password so I had to create another account to finish this. Ugh.


    calicomoth
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 8:45 am #153789

    Part 3.
    Id send that above message right now if I had the guts, but it still seems too blunt, I’m worried about scaring him off for good & ruining my chances.
    Any suggestions of what I can write exactly, or any advice on how to proceed would be greatly appreciated. I just really want this at least once haha. I can’t help but to fantasize about him, I’ve never felt this way before. I also got out of a 5 year relationship semi recently so maybe that contributes, lonely but also haven’t had sex in a couple years. I’ve had a crush on him since high school. Apparently he’s liked me since then too, but we both were too shy to ever talk about it back then… I’m not sure if I even want a relationship, but I’ve never been so certain in my life that I want him all to myself for even just an hour.


    calicomoth
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 8:45 am #153790

    Id send that above message right now if I had the guts, but it still seems too blunt, I’m worried about scaring him off for good & ruining my chances.
    Any suggestions of what I can write exactly, or any advice on how to proceed would be greatly appreciated. I just really want this at least once haha. I can’t help but to fantasize about him, I’ve never felt this way before. I also got out of a 5 year relationship semi recently so maybe that contributes, lonely but also haven’t had sex in a couple years. I’ve had a crush on him since high school. Apparently he’s liked me since then too, but we both were too shy to ever talk about it back then… I’m not sure if I even want a relationship, but I’ve never been so certain in my life that I want him all to myself for even just an hour.


    timberman123
    Participant
    October 24, 2017 at 11:40 pm #153925

    Guys won’t be scared it will simply make him more proud of himself I don’t really know how to explain it really but he won’t hate it at all


    nicole
    Participant
    October 25, 2017 at 12:35 am #153930

    I would just tell him he should come visit and maybe have a drink or something and take it from there. I wouldn’t be too forward unless you know he’s actually into that, if I’m trying to hook up I don’t make it too obvious I just let things kind of flow lol.


    Anonymous
    October 25, 2017 at 11:21 am #154002

    Just tell him. If you think he might not be okay with it then frame it in a way where you make him feel okay to say he’s not ready