How to work around things that are going against me in dating

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How to work around things that are going against me in dating

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    JeffS
    Participant
    May 4, 2015 at 12:08 pm #78378
    How to work around things that are going against me in dating

    Ok so I have no idea what women want. Every time it doesn’t work out, I have no idea why.
    Here is what I think I have going for me:
    Established in my career, financially stable, highly intelligent, tip top physical condition (run 4 min mile, bench over 400 lbs, etc)

    Going against me:
    Asperger syndrome and PTSD – I have a hard time connecting to people, understanding any sort of dynamic of any social situation, this my whole life has lead to me being bullied, mistreated and abused until I snapped. I found myself in all sorts of trouble and joined the Army to take my rage out on the world and make someone else feel my pain. I probably had PTSD before the Army but it definitely is worse now.
    Being 29 and doubt I’ve ever been loved by anyone in my life, I’ve faked relationships in the past but really couldn’t get very far
    Being an Atheist – a lot of women want nothing to do with someone who doesn’t believe in god.


    JeffS
    Participant
    May 4, 2015 at 12:19 pm #78379

    Continued:

    being boring – I can’t fake interests and my only hobbies are photography, working out, martial arts, mountain climbing, can’t meet people with similar interests
    being intimidating – I try not to intimidate ANYONE but any time I go on a blind date, they meet me, all the sudden they’re terrified, all I did was show up and try to be nice
    being introverted and unable to hold a conversation with a large group of people
    dislike of clubs with loud music – i can’t meet anyone when I’m yelling all day, makes my ears ring, etc
    not comfortable approaching strangers and not being approachable myself
    don’t understand chemistry since I never experienced it
    no family


    JeffS
    Participant
    May 4, 2015 at 12:29 pm #78382

    I have resorted to online dating for the past 3 years. Before that, I only had 2 dates in my life. Online, I have had maybe 100 dates by now. I have had a few girlfriends but failed to develop any feelings for them and broke it off when I realized this.

    I am not looking for people to feel sorry for me, I am only stating my situation the way I see it. However, any advice on how I could improve my situation would be greatly appreciated. I’ll never give up and give in to despair but I would like to have more success than I am having.