I just need some advice/answers/opinions


I just need some advice/answers/opinions

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    January 21, 2015 at 1:43 am #71340
    I just need some advice/answers/opinions

    So I’ve been dating this wonderful girl for about a year now. I’m 18 and she’s 17. We’re madly in love with each other. We actually talk about marriage a lot and we’re thinking about doing it in the summer of 2016. I am planning to propose but not till sometime in 2016. She’ll also be 18 by that time. Plus, we will be dating for at least 2 years by then. Do y’all think we’re going to fast? Personally, I don’t think so but what do y’all think?
    Also once that time hits, she doesn’t want to have a wedding. She want to go to the court house and just sign the papers for the marriage license. She says she’s scared about the “what-if this doesn’t work out” possibilities and the fact that if we do split up she doesn’t want to have a wedding to regret. I; however, do want a wedding. It’s a very special day for us. I don’t want to regret not having a wedding if we do happen to work out and last. She says for our 2-3 year anniversary, we’ll have a big ceremony similar to our wedding. Thoughts?

    January 21, 2015 at 9:47 am #71349


    Yes you maybe going too fast I think but that’s what happens when your young and in love. It’s nice to think about your future marriage to her and everything but as you get a little bit older you guys will change your minds about a lot of things whether you like to believe it or not. When I was her age (now 23) I was completely against marriage and these days I so want the big wedding with the white dress lol.

    My advice is to just enjoy what you two have right now and don’t worry about details of weddings and marriage until it happens.

    Still continue to discuss your future with her but don’t take everything to heart as I said your still young and you may think differently in a couple of years. She may want the big wedding with all the trimmings in a couple of years:)

    January 21, 2015 at 12:56 pm #71352

    If she is already thinking “what is this doesn’t work out”, that’s a good sign its too soon. You guys are young and waiting will only make you a better couple and/or avoid a divorce.

    January 22, 2015 at 4:48 pm #71626

    You could get engaged (to let her know that things are serious) and just stay that way indefinitely for about 4 years or so. By then, you should know whether you are truly compatible for marriage. My parents were 17 when they got engaged, and they are not a happy couple although they are still married. The only reason they are still together are for the kids sake.

    January 24, 2015 at 9:54 am #71778

    When you are young and in love, it’s hard to look further into the future and realize what issues may arise as you get older together. People change a lot in their 20s and 30s and you both could become someone quite different than you were when you got married so young. I got married at 19, I am now going through a divorce after 18 years of marriage. We are different people entirely. I went to college and I changed very much, and he seemed to regress as we got older. He also must have had different feelings as he got older because he began to cheat on me. I’m just saying that you should thing rationally about what the future may hold. You can never be entirely sure of what may come or how you will feel 10 or 20 years down the road. My best advice is to try an engagement for a while, and enjoy each others company in unmarried bliss for a long while. I have three children from my marriage, and I stayed with him for their sake for a long, unhappy time in my life.