I need help… Advice ASAP

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I need help… Advice ASAP

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    dova91
    Participant
    September 22, 2015 at 1:28 am #85682
    I need help… Advice ASAP

    Ok so this is a pretty long story but I’m gonna try and make it short as possible. I’ve been dating this guy for about 5 years now. We are both 23 years old and we have a beautiful 18 month old son. Unfortunately we’ve been through a lot. He cheated on me when I was pregnant multiple times and also used to call me names. I suffered a lot. After the baby was born he asked me for a chance and because I love him (at this point not even sure if it’s love) I gave it to him. He did change and we try to work things out but we were still not living together. I made a huge mistake and I lied to him multiple times when he was ready to commit (I lied when I told him that I was working but in reality I’ve lost my job, I also lied when I didn’t tell him that I needed money for rent so that he doesn’t stress out) I understand that a lie is a lie and I was wrong. I asked for his forgiveness since I do want to be with him and after that all we’ve been doing is argue and all he does is ….


    dova91
    Participant
    September 22, 2015 at 1:34 am #85683

    (Sorry long story) all he does is reject me and it hurts me so much because I do care. I’ve been trying to prove to him that I regret everything and that I love him and I feel that I’m actually pushing him away. He has a very short temper and every single time I try to have a conversation with him he gets aggravated and tells me that I’m annoying and tiring and that he’s sick of me. It hurts me so much bc he doesn’t see that I’m here for him and that I love him. I want to help him out when it comes to school bc he’s not good at math and I am and he doesn’t even care that I’m offering my help. He says that I’m drowning him and I tell him that he’s looking at this in anegative way. But today is when I saw that this needs to stop. When I was expressing myself he yelled at me and said “shut the f** up” I’m sick of you!” That hurt me so much bc I don’t deserve this type of treatment. I think that he’s being disrespectful and a complete jerk. Please someone tell me what to do!!


    nature123
    Participant
    September 28, 2015 at 8:41 pm #86095

    Cheating shouldn’t be acceptable in any circumstances


    idkwhatswhat
    Participant
    September 29, 2015 at 10:21 pm #86212

    In my opinion once a cheater always a cheater. And also if he really loves you he wouldn’t put you down so much. He wouldn’t make you feel so bad about lying to him when he basically did the same thing to you when he cheated on me. You may love him, but sometimes whats right is the hardest decision to make.


    lucylily
    Participant
    November 11, 2015 at 9:49 am #88264

    I have had many relationships and tbh still not mastered the perfect one. I think in a realistic world we all need to be happy and that needs to start with ourselves. Ask yourself does this situation make you happy? If it doesn’t how do you stop being unhappy? If it means time away from each other so be it. In an ideal world everyone is forgiving but when there’s history I think we are only human and it takes a bigger person to get over trust issues. I know I haven’t been able to in the past and still to this day struggle.

    Perhaps give each other some space. As much as it will tear you up inside…Sort out your problems and revisit in a month or two… Obviously with a baby involved you will have to have contact but just keep it about baby and nothing else. If you miss each other after some space I think it’s fair to say you will be able to tell. The hard thing will be if one person doesn’t miss the other. All you can do is accept and move on. x


    RZOA
    Participant
    November 11, 2015 at 9:46 pm #88320

    Move on.
    Seriously this dude sounds like a dick


    devistated1228
    Participant
    November 13, 2015 at 3:41 am #88411

    My ex left one week ago. We were /are engaged. We’ve been together for 5 years and the hurt from our past is what made us an unstoppable team. Recently, he received a promotion and we were finally on a road of financial stability. With this I believe he has gotten a taste of freedom that he feels I hold him back from . The last month of our relationship I was very down on myself not once thinking it would push him away. Because we were in the middle of building our lives together , our names are on vehicles and such together. So this makes the “no contact” rule nearly impossible. He saw me 2 days ago and told me how beautiful I looked and how he knows this can’t be the end for us but at the same time he is being very put-offish. How do I show him that the only thing he’s wrestling with is himself and how do I make him miss me. I think he already is just a little but not enough to come get me back. Also, he’s aware that I’m growing despite how down on myself I had been. Help