I thought he was losing interest but asked me to be his girlfriend randomly

DATING ADVICE FORUM

I thought he was losing interest but asked me to be his girlfriend randomly

    Author
    Comments
  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    December 12, 2017 at 2:24 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

    Hey DatingAdvice.com forum readers! Just a quick heads up that a few dating sites are offering a FREE trial to DatingAdvice forum readers. Try it now and meet local singles in just a few minutes! Here are the sites:

    Site Who You'll Meet Today's Deal
    Match.com Casual dating for ages 18-65 Get FREE access
    Elite Singles Educated professionals 25 and older Get FREE access
    AFF.com Hookups, casual encounters Get FREE access

    What are you waiting for? One mouse click could be all that stands between you and your next romance!


    Confused888
    Participant
    June 25, 2016 at 1:54 pm #104071
    I thought he was losing interest but asked me to be his girlfriend randomly

    I met this guy from an app, and we really hit it off on our first date. I felt so comfortable around him, he made laugh, and even finished it off with a goodnight kiss/makeout. In the span of three weeks now we have gone on a lot of dates every few days. We got very physical very fast. After probably our third date we already had to have a talk of what our physical boundaries were. We are both religious,but I don’t want to have sex until I am married. He said he wish he could say the same thing, but he definitely wants to have sex with me. He said he would respect me and my boundaries and that maybe we should pause on the physical stuff and cool down a bit. I really respected that and appreciated him being so vulnerable and honest with me.
    But after that talk we have about 4-5 days go by between our next date which felt like a really long time compared to how much we were hanging out. In the few days he didn’t text me for 2 of them, would stop relplying randomly


    Confused888
    Participant
    June 25, 2016 at 1:57 pm #104072

    And just made me feel like maybe he was loosing interest, on top of that I knew he was still on dating apps so it made me assume he was seeing other girls. Which is totally fine because we didn’t have a title, but it still made me feel weird.
    Then we hung out and had a great date, nothing physical just enjoyed each other’s company. Then the weird communication happened again, until last night. We had another date and going into it I was really curious as to how it was going to be because I felt like maybe I was just hookup to him or something. Then while we’re watching a movie he starts kissing me, then pulls away looks at me and just says ” will you be my girlfriend” and it honestly caught me so off guard I asked if he was joking. Of course he wasn’t, but I’m just so confused because he seems so interested in person but our communication between seeing each other sucks. I’ve had a few long relationships, and he hasn’t so I wonder if I just have different expectations or something.

    alltvaxa
    alltvaxa
    Participant
    June 27, 2016 at 9:31 pm #104152

    I have many points for you to potentially think about!!
    1. texting is weird! being on the other end; sometimes i just dont text back for NO REASON AT ALL. I just forget! or i can’t think of anything to say so i dont say anything to save myself from getting embarrassed. just keep in mind that maybe he’s more of a personal interaction type.
    2. he doesn’t know how things work aka long relationships are strange to get used to and if you’ve never experienced one, dating may just seem like the next “written step” in a way. If he’s never been in one, he might be nervous and not know how to keep you around.
    3.he could be getting more comfortable with you! if you became basically best friends in a short period of time he could just think it’s okay to not text back sometimes because he doesn’t really feel like it and you’d understand.
    4. he could be trying to spice things back up! if he want’s to have sex, he wants to see if you’d be a good partner to live with and be around all the time.


    Confused888
    Participant
    June 28, 2016 at 9:40 am #104073

    But being boyfriend and girlfriend is a serious thing to me, and I honestly don’t know if I should have said yes because I don’t know what that title even means to him. i guess I’m just looking for any outsider view on this!! Thanks


    hiddenkite
    Participant
    June 28, 2016 at 11:35 pm #104217

    Usually-to me at least-being someone’s girlfriend means they’re exclusively seeing you and wants to get to know you more on an personal level. In regards to sex, if he says he’s going to respect your decision to wait you need to hold him to that. If he tries to pressure you into something more, he’s not the guy you should be with because you two wouldn’t have aligned viewpoints. Some people suck at texting and keep their plans internalized so when they express them, it comes across as really random, like when he did when he asked you to be his girlfriend. Overall, I’d say communication is key, so even though it’d just be awkward, maybe just try to ask what the title means to him.