I'm suffering over this guy. I need serious advice!

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I'm suffering over this guy. I need serious advice!

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    badlucklove
    Participant
    August 23, 2017 at 2:34 pm #146681
    I'm suffering over this guy. I need serious advice!

    Ok. I will try to explain as short as I can. I’ve been dating a guy for a year now. It’s been great, but also not so great. He’s a very flaky person. We don’t spend a lot of time together, but when we do its always a blast. So what brought me here is this. He recently took a trip with guy friends. I was ok with it until I see pictures being posted on social media with a female I don’t know laying all over my boyfriends hotel bed, she was laughing, kinda posing, and acting a little bit of an easy woman. He is standing by the bed in all 24ish pictures giving her high fives, and touching her hand in one. My heart sank when I saw these, it felt disrespectful, hurtful, and left me wondering what the heck went on. She comments on all the pics saying things like “oh I’m so sad to see you leave, such a awesome time, Don’t post the rest of the pics, we need to save face, laughing about it. Is this disrespectful or should I chill? I can’t write anymore, will not let me!


    badlucklove
    Participant
    August 23, 2017 at 2:38 pm #146683

    P.s. he said her boyfriend was there, which there was another guy in like two pics. He said he didn’t do anything wrong, swore at me, and said he didn’t want issues. He leaves me feeling sad and depressed all the time, doesn’t take care of me and I have major medical issues. We see each other on his time, and I really think he is a selfish person, his way or highway. I keep having talk about he has to do better, he says sorry, does better for like a week then back to normal. I’m sick of getting hurt but what to do?


    Anonymous
    August 23, 2017 at 4:53 pm #146738

    Hi. I’m sorry for your distress.

    I often ask client’s how does your partner make you feel about yourself. In this case you’ve answered. Not good!

    So the very first question is, are you willing to accept that he swears at you and all of the above that you wrote about? If the answer is no, then you’ll want to make a decision that reflects that. If, you feel there are overriding factors that make it worthwhile you’ll want to consider them.

    It’s important to know what you bring to a relationship and what you’re willing to accept. We all have to take care of ourselves first.

    Is being in a relationship important enough to accept what you have described. Only you can determine this.No one can advise you. You must consider what is healthy for you and what makes you feel good.

    One question might be: what is it that makes me want to go out with him. If I can post this link, it might help. https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/before-you-give-up-dating-read-gmp/

    Hope this helps. Dave