Is He Just Stringing Me Along?

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Is He Just Stringing Me Along?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    velvetred
    Participant
    September 8, 2014 at 11:41 pm #60974
    Is He Just Stringing Me Along?

    I don’t wish to ask friends/family for advice so I’m hoping you all can give me some input.

    I met this wonderful guy online and we texted/called each other a lot for 3 weeks before meeting up. I’ve never met anyone that way before but I felt really comfortable with him and there was great connection. I actually feel more comfortable with him than with my bf of 3 years (now ex).

    However, after our first date last week, he hasn’t been texting a lot, just “good morning”, “how was your day”, “good night”. He also told me he has been very very busy at work and can’t even find the time to relax. I understand that, and I actually don’t text him unless he texts me as I don’t want to bug him.

    He hasn’t mentioned anything about a second date, but on our first date, he said we should hit the beach next time.

    We have not talked about exclusivity, but I made it clear that I only date one guy at a time. He said he’s the same way.


    velvetred
    Participant
    September 8, 2014 at 11:42 pm #60975

    He said he told his parents about me, and he introduced me to his dad in person.

    He could just be lying about all these, but I’m trying to trust him. I’ve been played and strung along before so I’m kinda paranoid this time. Please note that I consider myself quite naïve and inexperienced about dating. This is only the 3rd time I’m dating someone in my life. I’m a 23 year old woman and he’s a 31 year old man. 

    What should I do? Keep trusting him (while going paranoid sometimes) and let him do his own stuff? Confront him about our current status and if he’s dating someone else and not interested in me anymore? Or is it too early to even be like this about someone?

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  velvetred.
    Me_too
    Me_too
    Participant
    September 9, 2014 at 2:14 am #60978

    Hello Velvetred, he spent a lot of energy getting to know you so he won’t go to all that trouble just for a quick thing but if you truly want to know if he is into him then let him chase you for a little bit. Play a little hard to get but not too hard. Always communicate your feelings and try to get him to open up as well. He’s a lot older than you so he’s gonna try to be in control and lead you and it seems that it’s working. If you actually met his dad then he does like you. I will not introduce a girl to my family unless I believe that there might be something. It’s normal for a guy not to text to much after the first date, we don’t want to appear to clingy… Also the whole point of that is for you to miss him and wonder if he is thinking about you too… Guess what? It’s working!!! Let him know that you’re not the kind of girl that play games and that he does not need to worry about impressing you and that all he needs to do is be himself. He is playing hard to get because

    Me_too
    Me_too
    Participant
    September 9, 2014 at 2:16 am #60980

    He believes he already won you over.. Just tell him to relax and let him chase you for a bit too 😉


    Brutus777
    Participant
    September 9, 2014 at 7:31 pm #61219

    Just tell him how you feel, see if he is on the same page, you will know if he is lying if you know him well enough.


    velvetred
    Participant
    September 10, 2014 at 8:36 am #61228

    @Me_too

    Thank you for the advice. I’ve posted this on another website as well and most were telling me to stop investing too much into this, since it’s only been a week that had passed. But it wasn’t just a normal date like going out for dinner. We were out the whole day and basically acted like a couple. Maybe I am too invested in this. Thing is, I don’t even hang out with guys so this date was actually a big deal for me. I did not contact him today and he didnt contact me either. First time not hearing from him since I first knew him a month ago. I’m just gonna be cool now and I’ll update you. Thanks. 🙂

    beatrice
    beatrice
    Participant
    September 11, 2014 at 3:54 am #61750

    After a first date, you can’t really tell if a guy is really interested on you or not. Its different when in chatting and when u met in person. He may have introduced you to his parent, but don’t be too confident about this (well, based on my experience).

    Since u met, but u barely know each other, like what other said, don’t invest too much on him, relax, don’t over think. For me, it seems too early to ask him about that, we don’t know what is he thinking, he might think Ur pressuring him, and guys doesn’t like that. Well, If he msg you again, and ask you out, then go, get know him more.. Let him pursue you, let him initiate. (But also remember don’t be always too available, he might use this as an advantage) soon, u’ll know if he is into or not that into you. And i suggest u should go meet and date others too. 🙂

    stephaniemoore
    stephaniemoore
    Participant
    September 11, 2014 at 6:42 am #61757

    What should I do? Keep trusting him (while going paranoid sometimes) and let him do his own stuff? Confront him about our current status and if he’s dating someone else and not interested in me anymore? Or is it too early to even be like this about someone?

    Hello, in my opinion you should let him do his own stuff. I really think that he is not serious about this relationship. If he would be serious he won’t be telling lie that he have told everything about the relationship to his parents. And I think that he is only having fun with you.

    I think you should move forward and find your true love who will be with you for lifetime. I would suggest you to read some good books related to relationships and love or you can just sign up for my webiniar – “It’s Raining Men Hallelujah”. All the best…:)