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AuroreParticipantFebruary 4, 2014 at 4:15 pm #47188
I’ve been dating a guy I met online for the past 2 months. We went to bed on our 4th date n had an intense affair during the holidays. Now things are back to normalcy (work, 50% custody) he contacts me less often in Jan but now I haven’t heard from him for 10 days. I’ve read tons of excerpts on why men withdraw because they need to time/space to recharge. I never pushed for “the talk” about future/exclusivity. Nothing was defined. We have common values n he knows I have developed feelings for him. About him, ugly divorce, 50% custody. Bad co-parenting relationship n constantly in fear for children being nihilistic, bored with job, doesn’t like his condo, said “I don’t want to let people down and I don’t want to let myself down”. Is he referred to me or the all the 3 girls he is dating; he says he is looking for life soulmate in profile. Has he moved on, exclusively w. 1 or is he recharging? I thought I just lay all these out for advice; I am feeling awful. Similar experience, anyone?
CenTXGalParticipantFebruary 4, 2014 at 11:07 pm #47211
10 days is a long time. If he really cared about you and continuing with your relationship, I don’t believe he would wait this long to communicate. Good luck and hopefully you can put things in perspective.
SpeckledBird10ParticipantFebruary 5, 2014 at 3:27 am #47215
If he cared he wouldn’t go without talking to you. Either he’s not interested, or he might be nervous about dragging you into what seems to be a messy personal life.
AuroreParticipantApril 11, 2014 at 5:55 pm #47394
I wrote him an email saying I was not walking away myself but just wanted to give him space and time. He called me, acknowledging my email and said he came down with a severe stomach bug and I knew he also had to travel to Florida for a national conference for 4 days. I know we have an amorphous pseudo “undefined” relationship, but my point is 10 days incommunicado?
AnonymousMay 27, 2014 at 7:48 am #53766
Guys tend to stay and move away if they have a lot of options around, they hop from one place to another so they could enjoy their lives that’s who they are, so don’t ask for exclusivity unless he is the one starting to ask for it.
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