My ex started talking to me again after almost a month of no contact


My ex started talking to me again after almost a month of no contact

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    March 19, 2013 at 10:48 pm #26319
    My ex started talking to me again after almost a month of no contact

    Hello all, I would really appreciate some advice on my situation. So I started seeing this guy in early December and we dated for about a month. Then all of a sudden he just went totally cold (like literally overnight), no explanation, no apologies, nothing. He said he still wanted to be friends but he never really made the effort to do even that. I was pretty upset because I had really developed feelings for him in the short time we were together. I still saw him at school though and we even work together once in a while. So for a while we would at least say hello to each other in passing but then he started a relationship with this other girl who lives about 2 hours away. He dated her for about a month and then he dumped her because he never really had feelings for her. So here is the part I’m confused about, around the same time he started dating her we stopped talking completely. We didn’t even make eye contact during the class we had together. This went on for about 3 weeks and then this past weekend we were working together and he just started talking to me out of nowhere and then he wouldn’t shut up the entire night. He kept coming up to my station and just talking about totally random things and about what had been going on in his life lately (except for anything about his girlfriend) and he was talking about what classes he is taking next quarter and stuff like that. Then the next day, I was on Facebook and I saw that he went from being “In a relationship” to “Single” and literally 5 minutes after his status changed he messages me to say hi and ask how I’m doing and basically just more small talk. Then this morning, we had class together and I was sitting in the cafe before class started and he comes out of the kitchen with a pancake he had made special for me. So I guess I’m just wondering if he is acting like this just because he wants to be friends or if it seems like he is reconsidering our relationship or what.

    March 20, 2013 at 1:39 am #26320

    Well if you’ve been reading this forum for any length of time at all you probably already know what I’m about to tell you because I’ve said it many times before. In fact some times I feel a bit like a broken record and every time I read a new question I get this nagging sense of dejavu.
    Anyway there are a variety of possibilities here. He may have just never been that into you in the first place and only stuck around as long as he did for the benefits (sex). Or if for some reason you were still not having sex after a whole month he may have left because he just got tired of waiting for sex. Either way the availability of this other girl was probably responsible for the timing of it.
    In any case I guess what you have to ask yourself now is why any girl with an ounce of self respect would want to get back together with a guy who clearly only wants to be with her when he has no other options.
    You know, before I started fielding question on this site a little over a week ago I had almost forgotten what it was like to be addicted to the dubious thrill of riding that emotional roller coaster that you seem to be so eager jump back onto. It’s all starting to come back to me now though and all I can say is, thank god I’m not 18 anymore.