Need advice on asking coworker out

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Need advice on asking coworker out

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    tman1234
    Participant
    May 19, 2015 at 8:56 pm #79365
    Need advice on asking coworker out

    I’m 38 shes 29. She just started working in my workplace since Nov. We chat, once a while, and we seem to get along, minor flirtation here and there. I wanted to ask her out without making it awkward or our professional relationship weird. Today, during a conversation about how she doesn’t go out much, I asked her if she’d like to go get coffee or a drink sometime, and I said most people at work are married and don’t go out. She agreed most are married, we continued talking, but the offer to go out wasn’t answered. I figured I’d wait a couple of weeks, see how she acts towards me, and if it’s like nothing happened, then I’d say to her, maybe me asking you out informally didn’t work, so how about meeting together after work for a drink? She does seem a little shy, so I wasn’t sure if she just didn’t know how to answer me or if her not answering me was her answer, or if I was thinking too much. Any advice or thoughts to ask her out one more time, and what to say, do, ect…..?


    Brunton1
    Participant
    June 23, 2015 at 10:04 am #81387

    Hi there, my advice is to bring it up again and ask her out, but this time, be specific. For example you can say, “After work today I only
    have about an hour before I have to pick up my uncle at the airport. Would you like to do a quick Starbucks with me? I would really
    enjoy that!” You see, if you are specific, it does two things. It makes her feel “safer” because you just put a time limit on the
    coffee visit. Secondly, it is a “direct hit” as I like to call these things. And yet, while it is a direct hit, so to speak, it also provides
    you the alibi of the time limit due to picking up your uncle or whatever. By the way, while I don’t promote frequent lying, it doesn’t
    hurt to have a little story like this to help you along, whether you are going to the airport or not! lol. Just remember that she
    believes that! After this, if she still won’t get together, let it alone, since you work with her But I hope it works out for you!
    Good Luck!!