Need advice on first step

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Need advice on first step

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    Brett123
    Participant
    March 15, 2014 at 6:16 pm #49321
    Need advice on first step

    Alright, so i think i need a bit of help from you guys into giving the first step to going out with a girl im kind of attracted to, and i’ve always failed at the first step because either i don’t know what to do (making me look either uninterested or desperate) or because i get too nervous and mess up somehow.

    Ok so with this girl i’ve known her only for a week now. She is in first year of medicine in my university and i’m in second year of med school. I met her because she chose me as her “tutor” (we made first year people choose from some kind of catalogue second year students as tutors), as all first year students get a second year tutor to help them with the new university system, and with studying materials, etc.

    So i got to talk to her and she is really nice. Can’t really say i like her because well its only been a week, but there are many chances i end up liking her if i get to know her more.

    Continued in post below


    Brett123
    Participant
    March 15, 2014 at 6:16 pm #49322

    Usually i have no problems talking with a girl when i don’t know her/don’t care if i make mistakes (so i have no trouble at all getting girls at parties or clubs for example, because i don’t mind failing). But when i like a girl its a different story. Everything mixes up and i get so nervous i do stupid things or say things i shouldn’t.

    I feel that my problem is on doing the first step from friends to something else. Usually because i’m too nervous. But this time i’m not and i wanted to do things right.

    Continued in post below

    Why doesn’t it let me post more than 2 short posts…? How am i supposed to tell the whole story.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by  Brett123.
    • This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by  Brett123.

    manofpeace
    Participant
    March 17, 2014 at 11:25 pm #49402

    There was a lot of stuff in that question, so I will try to answer it as best as I can. The fact that you posted here about your situation and her means that she’s a keeper. You seem interested in the person and if I were you I’d make sure to get her number if you didn’t already. That’s the first step. Just say, “hey would you like to text me if you need help with studying?” Give your number and then the 2nd step would be to get to know her. Chat for a bit over text and then if you like her ask if she wants to go for a coffee. I’m sure you’ll know what to do from there. But the first step would be to get to know her. Hope I helped!


    Brett123
    Participant
    April 11, 2014 at 6:13 pm #49325

    Without trying to sound arrogant i have a pretty good background: I’ve been told i am attractive; i’ve been in sporting international competitions with high international medals; i’ve achieved respected positions in my sport, i study medicine which is an extremely hard career to join in my country, with only the best scores being able to enter (and people still have the prejudice of “he/she studies medicine, he/she is probably a genious”); i have money; i can sing, act, play instruments, etc. So i believe my biggest failure is my attitude when it comes to girls.

    So with this girl i started well because i don’t really mind failing because i’m not in love with her yet, just a bit attracted. We met a few times, i talked to her a bit of the university, gave her some studying material, and then we started just talking.


    Brett123
    Participant
    April 11, 2014 at 6:14 pm #49324

    I feel that my problem is on doing the first step from friends to something else. Usually because i’m too nervous. But this time i’m not and i wanted to do things right. Without trying to sound arrogant i have a pretty good background: I’ve been told i am attractive; i’ve been in sporting international competitions with high international medals; i’ve achieved respected positions in my sport, i study medicine which is an extremely hard career to join in my country, with only the best scores being able to enter (and people still have the prejudice of “he/she studies medicine, he/she is probably a genious”); i have money; i can sing, act, play instruments, etc. So i believe my biggest failure is my attitude when it comes to girls.

    So with this girl i started well because i don’t really mind failing because i’m not in love with her yet, just a bit attracted. We met a few times, i talked to her a bit of the university, gave her some studying material, and then we started just talking.


    Brett123
    Participant
    April 11, 2014 at 6:14 pm #49326

    Without trying to sound arrogant i have a pretty good background: I’ve been told i am attractive; i’ve been in sporting international competitions with high international medals; i’ve achieved respected positions in my sport, i study medicine which is an extremely hard career to join in my country, with only the best scores being able to enter (and people still have the prejudice of “he/she studies medicine, he/she is probably a genious”); i have money; i can sing, act, play instruments, etc. So i believe my biggest failure is my attitude when it comes to girls.

    So with this girl i started well because i don’t really mind failing because i’m not in love with her yet, just a bit attracted. We met a few times, i talked to her a bit of the university, gave her some studying material, and then we started just talking.

    Continued in post below

    rimiahuja
    rimiahuja
    Participant
    April 11, 2014 at 6:15 pm #49355

    Good and helpful advice I also found here.


    bryceisbryce
    Participant
    April 14, 2014 at 6:18 pm #51174

    First step is to ask her to hangout in a non-tutoring situation. Like out for coffee or something simple like that. If you’re not flirting with her already, you should start. Start sitting closer to her, make any excuse to touch her hand, make lots of eye contact. When a girl makes me nervous I imagine that we’re already dating. It makes me instantly more comfortable with them and it allows me to just be myself.

    Sarah Herzog
    Sarah Herzog
    Participant
    April 15, 2014 at 6:03 pm #51271

    Just please do not expect her to make the first step. That will bring so much confusion in your relationship.