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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    brettstick
    Participant
    May 8, 2013 at 4:40 pm #30766
    Need Help

    Im 15 in 9th grade now almost summer, and in 8th grade in jr. high in the beginning of the year in art i saw this cute redhead that ive had a crush on since ive met her. anyway i have like no self esteem and dont talk alot to anyone but she was in my science class also so i kind of shimmed my way into knowing her and she would sometimes walk around the campus in the beginning of the day with me before school started. i dont think we got to close but i was always very shy anyway when summer started me and one of my other friends who lived near me would hang out with her but it was obvious that she did not lean toward that other friend and she always had a closer attachment to me, she came over every once and a while as a friend and we would joke alot but i dont think she ever really know i really really was into her. about 3 quarters through summer i asked her out she accepted but she changed her mind about a week later after i got the text late for personal reasons and my phone was not available to me. anyway it was so insufficient we diddnt even acted like weve ever dated. so after that ive been friends with her all this year and about 4 months ago she had this boyfriend (who she now is broke up with) and i just fell for her madly because she started to walk home with me again and i forgot how much i liked her and oh my gawd i still cannot stop thinking about her i try to tell her how i feel but the friend zone is just so awful man but im like in love with her or something anytime i see her or anything that reminds me of her i get a surge of like pain or something for a second. she just doesn’t want to be with me and i am just devastated i tell her i really really like her i know i shouldn’t because we are friends but i just like her too much and its just stupid how much i like her. and for a few weeks i couldn’t even look at her how hurt i was, it wasn’t her fault. but i was just so hurt and still am and she thinks i hated her so the past couple of days shes been giving me more attention and hugs and i really dont think that this is helping my feelings towards her and i dont want to lose her as a friend but i like her so so so much. i just dont know what to do and ive never liked a girl anywhere near as much as i like her its crazy and she walks home with me most of the days and it just hurts me so much to be near her. and ive never had a girlfriend and i feel unconformable when i flirt im just at a loss.

    should i just straight up tell her that her being around me more isnt helping my feelings for her or somthing else i honestly have no idea but im just cant get her off my mind for probably as long as ive known her and it hurts so much

    knock knock
    knock knock
    Participant
    May 14, 2013 at 6:47 pm #31253

    don’t worry! it can be scary and weird all at once when you have a crush on a girl. You probably know what she’s looking for in a guy by now (maybe) so is there anything you can do to show her you’d be a good/fun boyfriend?

    If she’s completely friend-zoned you, it’ll be tough. So if you know for sure there’s no chance then do yourself a favor and stop hanging out with her to the point that it hurts. Be her friend, not a stoop to sit on. Even if you’re both walking the same way home, find another way and ditch her so you spare yourself the sanity. You’ll grow and become more independent instead of just being teased to extreme measures.

    Admit what’s reality and accept what’s what. If you can do something, do it. If you can’t work with it too.